Total pages in book: 94
Estimated words: 91363 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 457(@200wpm)___ 365(@250wpm)___ 305(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 91363 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 457(@200wpm)___ 365(@250wpm)___ 305(@300wpm)
I snorted.
He wrote:
I’m serious.
I took back the pen.
You want to marry me just to have sex?
No. I want to marry you because I’ve loved you FOREVER!!! All day sex is just a bonus.
“Gabby? Are you ready?” Dad called from downstairs.
“Yes,” I replied. “Just a sec!”
“Dad is ready to go,” I signed, nodding toward the door before walking that way.
Ben hooked his arm around my waist, hand on my little baby bump as he hugged me from behind. “Marry me, Gabby,” he said next to my ear. “I don’t have a ring, yet, and I know this is all out of order and not the fairy tale you always dreamed of. Still, marry me.”
I pulled away from him and stepped into the hallway, then I glanced back and rolled my eyes.
“Wow. Thanks for that,” Ben said, deflating.
“What?” I signed.
“I just asked you to marry me, and you roll your eyes like it’s a joke? We’re having a baby.”
I wrinkled my nose at him and finger spelled, “S T U P I D.”
“Stupid? You think I’m stupid?”
I nodded while grinning, but Ben didn’t find humor in my reply, so I stepped back into the room and nudged him aside to reach my desk and the pad of paper.
You got your preacher’s daughter pregnant. Of course you have to marry her, STUPID! I rolled my eyes because you asked me as if you think either of us has a choice.
“Gabriella!” my dad called.
“Yes. I’m coming!” I jerked my head toward the door.
Ben kept his frown, even after reading what I wrote.
When I reached the bottom of the stairs, I slipped on my sandals and followed my dad outside. As we pulled onto the main road, he cleared his throat.
“I know you don’t understand why I’m forcing you to abide by house rules, but just because you and Ben did something you should not have doesn’t make it right to keep doing it.”
“I know. And just so you know, he asked me to marry him. And I kind of assumed that was the obvious next step.”
Dad nodded. “I think the sooner the better.”
“Because you’re embarrassed that I’m pregnant and not married?”
He winced, shooting me a quick sidelong glance. “No, Gabriella.”
“Come on. There’s no way you’re not a little embarrassed. You preach to everyone in this town about the importance of honoring God in all we do, and your nineteen-year-old daughter gets pregnant her freshman year at college. That totally doesn’t feel like a ‘praise God’ moment.”
“Darling, I’m human. Of course, it’s not what I wanted for you or our family. There is a long list of things in my life that have not gone as planned. We are all sinners.”
“But you had higher hopes for me. After everything Sarah and Eve put you through, I was your last chance to feel fatherly pride.”
Dad barked an unexpected laugh. He was a somber man of God with a practiced smile for his congregation, but he rarely laughed out loud.
“Gabriella, I never thought of it like that.” He continued to chuckle.
I crossed my arms over my chest and stared out my window. “Why is sin so tempting?”
“No one is completely immune to desires of the flesh. When we give in to such pleasures, it’s a symptom of our separation from God. When we allow that separation, sin steps in to fill that void.”
“Dad, please don’t say ‘desires of the flesh.’ It sounds perverted. And I don’t want to look at my child and think of him as the result of desires of the flesh.”
“When you look at your child, what do you want to think?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know, but I don’t want to feel like they’re a mistake. Bob Ross says there are no such things as mistakes, just happy accidents. This baby is a happy accident.”
He hummed. “Perhaps.”
That was as good as it got. “Perhaps” from my dad was synonymous with “yes.” When my sisters and I were younger, we’d bug him for things like letting us spend the night with friends, going to the local carnival, or opening one Christmas present on Christmas Eve. And every time he gave us a “perhaps,” usually followed by “I’ll think about it,” that was a yes.
CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR
CHICAGO, “WILL YOU STILL LOVE ME?”
Ben
After Gabby and her dad left, I checked with Janet to see if she needed help in the kitchen. She was on the phone, so I returned to Gabby’s room to tidy things up after she dumped everything into piles on her floor.
I emptied her backpack, stacking notebooks and folders onto her desk, accidentally scooting her Bible off the edge. When I picked it up, I shook my head at the weathered leather cover and limp, broken binding. The margins on every page were filled with her handwriting. Poems and doodled hearts. For years, I sat beside her in church as she poured her young heart onto the blank spaces, but I never focused on the actual words.