Total pages in book: 93
Estimated words: 89023 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 445(@200wpm)___ 356(@250wpm)___ 297(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 89023 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 445(@200wpm)___ 356(@250wpm)___ 297(@300wpm)
Then she’s gone. Like she was never here.
I let out a breath, feeling completely crazy. I mean, being a halfbreed was insane enough. I only ended up here because Lucia was attracted to my boyfriend. I was a tagalong. He was killed years back now. I don’t even remember his name, actually. He died, I stayed.
It’s not that I was invisible. I had pink hair, after all. People saw me, but no one took any notice of me.
Not until Paul came up from the ground and made me his.
Not until Josep came up from the bunker and made me his.
In the foggy cave Josep suddenly opens his eyes. They are so bright and purple, they light up the darkness on this side of things. “I see you,” he says. Then he smiles, shoves me off his neck, and presses his mouth into my throat.
I feel the bite. On this side of things, I feel it.
And it feels good.
The pull. It’s glorious. I want him to eat me all night and day. For eternity.
And I don’t even have a choice in that. He’s going to take it, he already told me.
So… why not take something for myself?
Why not take him back?
As soon as I think this, I’m out of the dream and back in my body in the cave. On top of him. Covered in blood. Lusting for it.
But not just the blood. I am lusting for this god of a monster beneath me.
I reach down, grab his hard cock, and put it inside me.
He pulls back from my neck, teeth dripping with blood, and laughs.
He did it.
He tricked me.
I gave in.
And it was my choice.
But I don’t regret it.
I don’t regret anything.
7 - Syrsee
Carrots and sticks
The first page of the book is a mirror. And even though this is weird, it feels inevitable. A mirror. A mirror.
A mirror.
Looking into the mirror I see myself, but a moment later I see Ryet and Paul in a bed. Our bed. I mean, mine and Ryet’s. And since this is a book, I know what to do with the mirror. I enter it, of course. That’s what I’ve been doing with all the books since I came back to the Guild, so it’s practically a habit now.
And then I’m her, the woman in bed with Paul and Ryet, and we’re feeding and naked. All twisted together and writhing on the scarlet-stained sheets.
My eyes are closed and I enjoy the feeling of the pull coming out of both sides of my neck. It feels so good. It has to though, doesn’t it? Because I’m not the kind of woman who has two men at once. It’s not my thing.
It wasn’t, at least.
But I find that I like being with Paul now. I desire him. Not in all the ways, but in this singular, specific way. I like being his food. I like being his… well, I’m not sure what I am to him or he to me. His part comes off as kind of custodial. A guardian. Which is ridiculous, because the word ‘guardian’ implies a level of protection and so far nothing about what has happened to me feels anything like protection.
Though I suppose it could always get worse.
“You think too much, Syrsee.” It’s not Paul who says this, it’s Ryet. Which is a clue. A clue that this isn’t real. But of course, I knew that. I literally stepped into a book. A story. A fiction.
This whole thing, it’s nothing but a fantasy. A good one, for sure. But fake. I know this.
“You don’t know anything. You’re a baby, dear Syrsee,” Paul says. His face is right up against mine, smiling. And his teeth are dripping with my blood. “Nothing but a baby.” Then he laughs and dives back down into his meal, which is me.
My grandma’s words come back to me in this moment—magnificent promises.
It bothers me. Because while Paul did casually reference a few promises while we were making our way to this point in time, they have nothing to do with why I let him feed on me in these dreams. Nothing at all, actually.
I let him feed on me for the same reason I allow Ryet to do it too.
Because I like it.
It’s as simple as that. I let him do it because it feels good.
A hand slips between my legs and when I turn my head, Ryet is smiling at me. His mouth is covered in my blood too. And not for the first time I wonder… how long will it last?
How long will they desire me? How long before I lose whatever it is that attracts them? How long before I am an old, empty bag of skin that tastes like a bitter pill?
It’s going to end. Everything ends eventually.
“You don’t have to worry about that, dear Syrsee.”