Total pages in book: 79
Estimated words: 77879 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 389(@200wpm)___ 312(@250wpm)___ 260(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 77879 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 389(@200wpm)___ 312(@250wpm)___ 260(@300wpm)
My stomach crunched, and my heart froze. “Unlock the door, Roman.”
He didn’t move.
I reached out and pressed the button to unlock it myself, but he locked it again just as quickly.
Again and again I unlocked it just for him to relock it and then he engaged the child locks.
My entire body burned with fury, with fear, and with something primal and raw. I thought we had an understanding. I was foolish to believe that I was going to escape this man.
He had lured me into a false sense of security and now I was an animal, backed into a corner again.
“Where are you taking me?” I screamed.
His fingers flexed on the steering wheel. His words came low, steady, and unbreakable.
“To the church.”
The church, I repeated in my head, not quite understanding.
The church?
My eyes opened wide as comprehension set in.
“No,” I said, the breath ripped from my lungs on a single word.
He didn’t respond. He sat there like a statue focused on the road; the car speeding up on the slick asphalt as we sped down the highway further from my freedom and closer to the church.
A part of me almost wished he was taking me to some warehouse to kill me. But no. This was so much worse.
“Roman, turn this car around,” I demanded.
My demands were met with complete silence.
I slammed my palm against the dashboard. “Damn it, Roman. You can’t do this. I won’t allow it.”
He let out a slow breath, controlled, unshaken. “I didn’t ask for permission. I won’t be asking for forgiveness.”
The storm grew heavier, raindrops hitting the windshield of the car and then flying off the sides in rivulets. The sky darkened and thunder rumbled.
Then the car pulled up to a small, old Russian Orthodox church, a single ray of sunlight shining through a break in the clouds and hitting the top of its golden dome.
Really? Even the sun was mocking me now?
I didn’t care if that single ray of sunlight in this dark storm was a sign from God himself. I couldn’t let Roman do this.
Roman deserved better. He deserved a woman who could give him the life he wanted.
He deserved a woman who could give him…give him…children.
Roman killed the engine and got out of the car.
I stayed put.
I sat completely still, staring at my hands, trying to figure out what to do.
Tears spilled down my face and onto my fingers as I swiped them away, my mind racing, trying to come up with some plan. Some excuse, some explanation that he would understand.
Roman opened my door and offered me his hand.
I didn’t move.
“Get out,” he said.
I shook my head. “No.”
He didn’t push. He didn’t move.
Rain poured down on him, but he didn’t react to it at all.
He was waiting for something. I wasn’t sure what.
My hands trembled in my lap. “I can’t.”
He squatted down next to the car. His fingers reached out to brush my chin as he guided my face to turn and face him. His gaze burned into mine. “Why?”
Why? It was such a simple question.
I swallowed, forcing myself to breathe. Forcing myself to tell the truth that I had been running from. He deserved that much. Maybe if I got him to see the truth, he would realize why I couldn’t walk into that church. Why I couldn’t marry him, and he’d take me to that plane.
“Because I love you, you bastard,” I whispered, my words ragged as I suppressed the sobs clawing their way out of my throat. “And I shouldn’t. It isn’t fair.”
The words hung in the air, curling like smoke in the small space between us.
Roman didn’t move.
Didn’t blink. But something in his entire body shifted. Like the storm changing course.
The rain around him slowed, but I barely noticed. The storm behind his eyes was far fiercer.
“You love me,” he said. His voice was low, wrecked, something close to a growl but barely a whisper. “And you think that’s a reason to leave me?”
I let out a bitter laugh.
Of course, he wouldn’t understand. Of course, I would have to spell it out for him, even though it killed me. Each word I said out loud was a stab to the heart.
“I wouldn’t make a good wife. You know this, Roman. I’m the enemy. I’m an outsider. You can’t keep me around your family. I don’t belong here, I don’t belong with you, and it doesn’t matter how much I want you, I will never belong here.”
He leaned in so closely I could see the gold flecks in his dark eyes. “Who cares? If you don’t feel like you belong here, then we will go somewhere else. I’ve spent my entire life as an outsider. For you, I will happily spend the rest of it the same way.”
I clenched my fists. The truth coating my tongue like a sour film. “I can’t give you children.”