Total pages in book: 111
Estimated words: 109038 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 545(@200wpm)___ 436(@250wpm)___ 363(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 109038 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 545(@200wpm)___ 436(@250wpm)___ 363(@300wpm)
My eyes suddenly dart toward the rooftop door, like I’m expecting it to swing open at any moment.
With camera flashes.
Paparazzi.
The whole world I’ve managed to avoid while I’ve been up on this roof.
“I need to clean up,” I repeat. “I have to get back inside.”
I stand up fast, and he steps up, too. “Can you quit freaking out?”
“I need something to clean off with and—”
“Here. Fuck. Just chill,” he says, quickly undoing the buttons on his shirt. He takes it off, revealing the sweeping tattoo that leads away from his collarbone, which I now see is a long tail that leads to a big, stylized line-drawn fox on his upper shoulder. He has more smaller tattoos I can’t make out across his upper arm, and one on his wrist.
He also looks much stronger than I would have realized. Lean, to be sure, but he’s not a waif. His muscles are defined, and I can see why he might have been interested in workout tips.
He balls up his shirt and pushes it into my hands.
“You want me to use this to clean myself?”
He gives me a look. “The hotel provides them for us. It’s fine, Logan.”
Holy fuck, I told him my first name.
Why did I do that?
I use his shirt to clean myself off and I zip my pants back up, tucking in my shirt.
“I’m going to be late. I need to get downstairs,” I tell him again.
He just gives me an upward nod.
I pull in a breath. “Good night.”
“Later.”
I get to the hall, and then the elevator. I check my phone and see that I actually am late, only by a couple of minutes.
When I get to the hotel lobby, I’m still completely wired. My shoes hit the marble floor as I cross the space, and for some reason I feel like I just committed some illicit crime.
I spot Emily sitting on a sofa near the front of the lobby. She glances up at me, waving.
“Car’s out back,” she says, looking at her phone. “First time I’ve ever seen you be late. Where’d you run off to?”
“Had to take a call. Went to the roof.”
She’s been my manager for a year, and my friend for longer. I’ve never lied to her until now.
I don’t know why I keep the truth to myself. She knows I’m not straight, but I find myself holding onto the idea of Chase.
It’s only three minutes past when we were supposed to meet the driver, but usually I’m ten minutes early to everything.
“Let’s head out.”
We step into the back alley behind the hotel. Far more barricades have been installed, and although people are waiting far off, no mob is able to come surround me now. A few rapid, bright flashes hit the corner of my eye and a gust of wind blows at me, ruffling my hair.
I reach for my sunglasses and shove them on quickly, heading toward the black car.
“Logan!” the photographers shout from behind a short fence, and I paint on a smile, raising a hand to wave at the paparazzi.
“It’s him!” I hear a girl’s voice call out, too.
My new life crashes over me again like a wave.
This is permanent.
Someone will always recognize me, everywhere I go. No matter what I’m doing… or what I just did.
So stupid.
Why did I take that risk?
I slide into the back leather seat of the black SUV, and Emily gets in on the other side. When the back doors finally shut, I’m back in a safe cocoon, but the adrenaline in my blood did tick up a little again.
“Okay. Dinner tonight is with Antonio Gallano. You’re in the running for his next movie already,” she tells me, tapping away at her phone as the blue glow highlights her face. “Then press interviews tomorrow, and filming for a YouTube channel where they make you eat spicy ramen while answering questions about Yard Line.”
“Got it.”
I leave my sunglasses on even behind the tinted windows in the car, well past midnight. When the driver pulls around to the front of the hotel I look up, gazing at the neon sign 20 stories higher, wondering if Chase is still up there.
My knees sting. My throat feels used. My fucking chest aches.
But the pain is the good part.
Physical pain is a breeze compared to the feelings that just got kicked up inside me. It’s overwhelming. It hits me hard, now that I have a moment to relax in the back of the car. I just did something with a man for the first time since…
Since Daniel.
Since I was 19, exploring myself with a friend, and it felt like nothing could ever take that away.
Daniel and I never kissed, never fucked. But it felt like we might do those things, one day. Until he got famous, got rich too quickly, and surrounded himself with people who didn’t question his affinity for cocaine.