Total pages in book: 85
Estimated words: 79244 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 396(@200wpm)___ 317(@250wpm)___ 264(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 79244 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 396(@200wpm)___ 317(@250wpm)___ 264(@300wpm)
I want to smell flowers every time I bury my face in his neck and buy him whatever clothes he wants. I want to fuck him on this stainless steel kitchen counter, and then give him a sponge bath in my ensuite. The way he gave himself to me completely just hours ago is a treasure, and I don’t want to let it go.
Why do all the things I care most for slip out of my grasp?
“You don’t really want to do this.”
More tears fall down his cheeks and I sense his fingers trembling on my shoulders. I hope he’s not afraid of me. “I don’t want to. But I have to. It’s the reasonable thing to do. I don’t belong here. But if I keep sleeping with you, if I kiss you and cuddle you in bed, I’ll delude myself into believing I do.”
“You do belong with me,” I whisper and cradle both his hands in mine. In this moment, it feels like the most truthful thing I’ve ever said to anyone. The idea that I would let him go after Christmas has been a delusion from the start. From the moment he fell into my lap, he was mine.
Killian looks away as if the cake is much more interesting than my eyes. I want to grab his cheeks, pull him back, and make him face the truth.
“I don’t know. Maybe after this whole thing, we’ll meet in New York, and things will be different.”
They won’t. Because I’ll still be the man with the fucked-up family.
I’ve made up my mind about him, and while this setback is frustrating to no end, I can play a longer game if that’s what he needs. Yes, I’ll miss fucking him senseless every night, but I’m not an animal. I’m a man with a sharp mind, and all I need to do is show him that I can respect his choices, all the while seducing him. As long as he remains my fake husband in public, I can kiss him, woo him, and lure him back where he belongs.
Killian wants me. He’s just got cold feet because of his shitty exes. I’m nothing like them, and once he learns that, he won’t be afraid of my family either.
With a soft exhale, I rest my forehead on his shoulder. “I like you, Killian. I really do. We’re a good fit,” I whisper, moving my hands up and down his shoulders. “But it must be your decision.”
Oh, how I resent even saying that.
But he’s my pretty green-furred kitten, and he needs to come to me on his own. Not that I won’t put in the effort into showing him what an amazing husband I could be.
At least I know he’s not going anywhere, so I have time.
“I get too easily attached. Like a fucking barnacle. This is better,” he whispers.
He’s not a barnacle. He’s a pearl I intend to keep safe and nurture. I won’t ever let him leave my side. Maybe it’s disingenuous of me to pretend he has a choice, but all is fair in love and war. All I promised is that I wouldn’t lie.
Now I only need to make sure he understands we both want the same thing.
“I’m going to miss you.”
He bites his lip and his eyes well up.
It’s just a matter of time, and I’m a patient hunter.
Chapter 14
Killian
It’s been hours since I fell into a trap equipped with two saws designed to take my life, and my body remains on high alert. Every unexpected sound is a sign of danger. Each figure looming at the edge of my vision might be an assassin, but Damen remains at my side, and his presence makes it all more bearable.
We did hold hands since the painful conversation in the kitchen, but he’s been respectful and hasn’t tried to woo me back into his arms. I’m happy with that. Or so I keep telling myself whenever he makes little romantic gestures for the sake of his family. He hasn’t pushed for me to change my mind about dissolving this partnership after Christmas, nor for keeping up our sexual relationship until then.
Like a gentleman.
He’s done exactly what I asked for, so why am I disappointed?
Is it toxic of me to have expected him to put up more of a fight? Happy would have.
Well, Happy might not be the best example, since he attacked me with a baseball bat for not wanting to sleep with him again, but there were others before him, who refused to be rejected this easily. Is it really so bad that I hoped Damen would go against my explicit wishes and fight for me, proving that his desire is so much greater than reason?
I guess a guy like him doesn't need to beg and plead with a street rat like me. As long as I'm his fake husband for the holidays so he can take part in the stupid hunt, he's happy to let me go later.