Total pages in book: 78
Estimated words: 77106 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 386(@200wpm)___ 308(@250wpm)___ 257(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 77106 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 386(@200wpm)___ 308(@250wpm)___ 257(@300wpm)
My blue eyes didn’t look as bright as they used to, thanks to the dark purple, seemingly permanent smudges under them.
Gone was that expertly applied makeup that I’d worn even just to go to the coffee shop in the past. The spray tan dates I’d been regular about? Done. My natural pale skin was on full display these days.
The fashionista I’d once been would curl her lip at my ever-present mom uniform of shorts and a tank or tee.
Looking away from myself, I filled the bottle, shook it up, then tested the temperature before going out to pick up my grumpy, grumbly baby.
“We’re gonna figure it out, right, baby?” I cooed at her, sitting on the edge of the bed, my body rocking to both soothe her and myself.
It’s not like I had any choice in the matter. I was all she had in the world. I didn’t have the luxury of failure.
My phone dinged from the nightstand, and I gripped the bottle with the arm holding my daughter so I could reach to check my messages. There was no choice but to take a job whenever one came in. I was just barely scraping by, and I really needed to add some money to a savings account. For car issues, new clothes as Lainey grew, and—most important of all—medical care, since health insurance costs would gobble up everything I was making.
I’d managed to hold down a job until I went into labor, purely because I needed the coverage for the hospital fees. But since I couldn’t afford any sort of childcare, I needed to quit after I left the hospital.
But now, we were on our own. And the idea of any sort of basic illness, let alone something serious, filled me with dread. I wouldn’t even let myself think of hospital stays.
“Oh, we have a new doggy friend,” I told Lainey as I slowly typed out a reply to the message I’d gotten on my listing as a dog walker.
I was thankful every single day that technology had created so many new ways to make a living while also being able to bring my baby with me.
Was it great to have to?
No.
But it was helping us get by.
Lainey loved long walks in her stroller. So our two dog-walking jobs not only gave her stimulation, and me exercise, it provided about sixty-dollars per day, minus the little bit I set aside for taxes.
And when we weren’t walking, we were driving from restaurants to houses or apartment buildings, dropping off food and making some tips.
Was I technically allowed to bring my baby for those jobs? No. But barring someone turning me in, I figured no one was getting hurt by breaking that particular rule.
The money for delivery wasn’t as good as the dog walking, but every three-dollar tip helped.
That said, another puppy would allow for more money without having to pay so much in gas as I typically needed to do for food delivery.
“Oh, and his mommy needs us six days a week,” I told Lainey, who was half-asleep with a little milk gathered in the corners of her mouth.
An extra thirty bucks meant that I could try to get some more food in my own body because as things stood, I was currently twelve pounds thinner than I’d been before I’d gotten pregnant. I was starting to look a little gaunt when I looked in the mirror.
Given my knotted stomach that made me worry I wouldn’t keep much down, I’d been putting most of my personal food budget toward stocking up on extra formula or diapers to have in case of a bad income week.
I dragged the playard between the two beds so Lainey would be close if she woke up fussy. I lived in fear of neighbors complaining about her crying and getting kicked out of our motel room.
Then I climbed up on the bed myself, turning on my side to watch my daughter sleeping peacefully.
“I promise I am going to get this figured out before you are big enough to know what’s going on,” I told her.
I might be willing to be hungry, to wear holes in my shoes, to neglect going to the doctor myself, but I’d be damned if my baby would ever personally know that sacrifice.
That was part of the reason why we’d changed to a new motel building.
Our last one had been closer to Miami. Which meant Miami rates. By moving a little further out, it allowed me to shave off a significant amount on our weekly rate.
I’d been worried that being further away from a big city would also mean that income would dip. But I’d been pleasantly surprised to find that being in a smaller town meant there was a lot less competition for said delivery jobs.
If all went to plan, I would have the start of a savings by the end of the week. Within a few months, I could breathe easier.