Total pages in book: 78
Estimated words: 77106 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 386(@200wpm)___ 308(@250wpm)___ 257(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 77106 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 386(@200wpm)___ 308(@250wpm)___ 257(@300wpm)
“Seems like there’s a lot to unpack there,” Velle said, flicking through the stations on the radio.
I felt like it said something that I’d chosen Velle to go with me on this errand. I could have picked someone like York or Caymen—men who would tag along while letting me keep my secrets. Or, you know, do it alone like I would have done in the past.
“The short of it is: I spent my teens there, raising the revolving door of foster kids my parents signed up for, so they could live off the checks.”
Velle’s brows shot up, but his head nodded.
“That explains so much.”
“You’re not gonna ask me why I bought it?”
“No, I can pretty much guess why you bought it. I’m curious why we’re going there, though.”
“The last lease was just up a week ago. And I didn’t re-up it.”
“I see.”
“Do you?”
“It’s time to go back and reclaim it. Reimagine it as a place for you and the girls.”
So, he did see.
I tamped down the discomfort at being seen, reminding myself that this was why I brought Velle along. I wanted someone to help me decide if this was healing or toxic.
“Something like that.”
It was also getting tight at the clubhouse.
With Lil’ Bit getting older—and getting more shit to play in and use—we were running out of room.
And, well, she was cramping our style.
Having sex in our room was basically impossible.
Sure, it was fun to fuck in the shower, in the shooting range, the garage, in the pantry, wherever we could steal a few minutes alone. But sometimes, you just wanted to fuck in a bed.
It was time for us to move on, move out, start something that was just ours.
We could still have the family that Zoe had grown so attached to. Only with more privacy and room to grow.
“Huh. Nice and close to the clubhouse,” Velle said as I flicked on the blinker before pulling up the drive.
There was an automatic tensing in my gut, but it quickly disappeared as the house came into view.
Suddenly, I was picturing the yard full of little kids chasing the poor lizards—squealing, laughing, stumbling and tumbling and having the time of their lives.
“Wow. Nice place,” Velle observed as I parked.
It was.
There were changes since the last time I’d seen it. Somewhere along the way, someone had repainted the stucco a warm yellow instead of white. The landscaping was lush and colorful where it had just been beds of rocks when I’d lived there.
Trees that had been small saplings had grown to provide ample shade.
It was familiar, but also new.
“Yeah,” I agreed as we climbed out and made our way to the front door.
The inside was as different as I’d anticipated, with several families having lived in the house since I’d last seen it.
The kitchen had been updated by the previous tenants, who’d asked me if they could ‘refresh it.’ They’d done more than that. The appliances were new. As were the countertops and floors. And they’d painted the cabinets. Though those were showing some wear and tear already.
In the other rooms, there were more subtle changes.
The white living room that had once been full of kids and toys, was starkly empty and painted a sage green.
“How many rooms is this?” Velle asked, turning in a circle.
“Five bedrooms.”
“Five,” Velle repeated. “You planning to make more babies with Zo?”
Before her, it wasn’t even a thought I entertained. I mean, beyond the occasional concern that—despite meticulous and constant condom use—someone might have an accidental pregnancy, no.
That said, watching Zo with Lil’ Bit, experiencing us as a trio, created this overwhelming feeling of rightness that I couldn’t deny, a desire for more of it.
“Maybe,” I said. “We haven’t really discussed it.”
Zoe was still recovering from the trauma involved with her surprise pregnancy, the end of her relationship and her career, then learning to try to eke out a living while taking care of a newborn.
She was still regulating, learning to get used to feeling safe and supported.
We could talk about that sometime down the road. As for me, I was at a place where I was open to either option: more kids, or just Lainey.
“Well, there’s time. At least Lainey can have her own room here. And peace and quiet.”
“Nah, Lil’ Bit is gonna miss the crazy at the club. She eats that shit up.” And the attention. She was constantly being scooped up and entertained at the clubhouse. It was going to be a big change for her to be somewhere else much quieter.
“Well, you’ll still be over there all the time. I’m assuming you haven’t talked to Zoe about this yet?” Velle asked, waving around the house as we moved out onto the back porch.
“No. I wanted to make sure it was livable before I even suggested it. But I got a feeling she’s gonna be game. She’s in nesting mode.”