Total pages in book: 248
Estimated words: 236036 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1180(@200wpm)___ 944(@250wpm)___ 787(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 236036 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1180(@200wpm)___ 944(@250wpm)___ 787(@300wpm)
For the first time in ages she felt completely stress free. Obviously knowing she had three weeks off work was part of it, but mostly… she was just so happy to feel so connected to Carter again. The love had been there. Their sex life had continued to be great. But she was starting to realize just how badly losing the D/s part of their relationship had damaged them both.
Fixing it meant everything, and the first step was to figure out where to go from here.
“I don’t think I’m cut out to be a Little,” she was saying. “I like reading about it, and I guess we all have that inner child who comes out sometimes, but I don’t think it’s part of my kink identity. Plus, I think it’s going to be a struggle just getting used to you bossing me again, without jumping straight into the deep end.” She paused to blow on her spoonful of stew, taking longer than necessary to give him a chance to jump in.
“Keep in mind we can always try different things and drop them if they don’t fit, Ally.” He waited until she nodded, and then continued, “But I think you’re right, Littles get a lot more supervision and a lot more rules, and that might be overwhelming for you.”
“It sounds like fun—the stuffies, the coloring, being entirely taken care of all the time, but I…”
“It’s not for you. That’s perfectly fine, sweetheart. The idea is to give you what you need.” He stared into the distance for a moment, thinking. “Instead of trying to fit yourself into a specific role, why don’t you tell me what you want me to give you?”
That was easy. “I think I’d just like to not have to make any decisions for a while. I’m tired of trying to hold everything together. Can you just be my Daddy and decide things?”
His mouth tilted up at one side and he laughed. “Doesn’t really sound much different from what we had before, except Daddy instead of Sir.”
It was different. She couldn’t explain how really, but it was. She shrugged and stirred the spoon around her bowl. “Daddy feels simpler. Easier.”
That wasn’t quite right, but she struggled to explain. In the end, she tried giving an example. “Sir is strict and requires me to place myself on the bed naked to wait for punishment. Daddy is stern, but understands that I don’t have the control to … to do that. So, he just drags me over and spanks me when I need it.”
Carter considered this. “Sounds like you want less protocol and less rigid structure. Not necessarily less rules or punishment…?” He trailed off and she nodded. “And you would be less responsible for your own behavior?”
She hesitated and then nodded again. “I think that’s right. I know this is confusing. It’s kind of all jumbled up in my head, but the best thing in the Daddy stories is how he just comes right in and handles things—whether it’s a problem that needs to be solved, or a punishment.”
“Or an evil boss that needs to be handled?” One eyebrow went up.
Oh. That … had actually been Daddy behavior. She squirmed in her seat. “Kind of, but work is-it’s different.”
“Hmm.” Apparently, he didn’t agree but declined to argue.
She decided not to try to change his mind on that point. “It won’t be too much work for you? Being a Daddy? I don’t want to be a bother.”
A soft smile curved his mouth, as he shook his head. “It won’t be too much, and you will never be a bother, sweetheart.”
“It’s just that you didn’t really sign up to be my parent, and I know it—”
“Allegra Cassidy Dalton, I signed up for you, and whatever you need. Besides, a Daddy is parental, but not exactly a parent. There’s a considerable difference there, especially when it comes to bedtime.” He smirked.
She was startled out of her worrying and laughed. “Well, there is that, and to be honest I find the whole grab and spank thing kind of hot, so more of that would be … nice.”
“I agree.” He pointed toward her bowl. “Now, finish your stew before it gets cold. We still have a punishment on the agenda for tonight.”
Oh. She’d pushed that out of her head, and now, with the reminder, her stomach seemed to curdle. There was an urge to push away the food and say she was full, but also a need to put off the punishment as long as possible. Eating won. She finished the bowl, one slow spoonful at a time, dragging dinner out as long as she possibly could.
Carter let her. He was obviously in no rush. She was still working on her first bowl of stew when he finished a second and started cleaning up the dinner dishes. It left her feeling guilty. “Let me help,” she said as she pushed back her chair.