Total pages in book: 86
Estimated words: 83777 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 419(@200wpm)___ 335(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83777 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 419(@200wpm)___ 335(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
Her voice cracked as the memory washed over her.
“There was a flash and a ringing in my ears, and the next thing I knew, Cooper hit the ground. He didn’t even get a chance to fire back. One second, he was standing right next to me, and the next he was gone.”
I could see that she was struggling to get through it, so I reached over and took her hand in mine and listened as she continued, “I tried to run, but there was no way out. They came out of the shadows...”
She tried to fight it, but the tears started to fall as she explained, “There were three of them. Maybe four. I tried to fight them, but one of them slammed the butt of a rifle against my head, and after that, everything went black. I woke up in the hospital two days later with a concussion, a couple of broken ribs, and a hell of a black eye.”
“Holy shit, Devin. You’re lucky they didn’t kill you.”
“Honestly, I don’t know why they didn’t. It doesn’t make any sense.”
“What happened to the girls?”
“I don’t know. They were gone. All of them. Just gone.”
I cursed again, louder this time. Devin looked over and I tried to remain calm as she told me, “I looked for them. Made myself sick looking for them. Deep down, I knew I was never going to find them, so I turned my badge in, and that was it. I still haven’t forgotten that girl’s face. Don’t think I ever will.”
“You did what you could.”
She didn’t answer.
She just let out a shaky breath and pulled her hand from mine, wrapping her arms around herself like she was trying to hold the pieces in place. “I made mistakes that night.”
“That’s understandable.”
“But it’s not.” She looked up at the stars and sighed. “We should’ve done a full sweep. Should’ve cleared every floor and every room and made sure no one else was inside. Even a rookie knows that… But the second I saw those women, my mind went blank and all I could think was I had to get them out of there.”
“I would’ve done the same damn thing.”
“No, you wouldn’t.” She shook her head. “You would’ve never put one of your brothers in danger like that. But I did. I didn’t think. I let my guard down, and Cooper paid for it. They all did.”
I hated seeing that she was tearing herself up over this. It wasn’t her fault. There was nothing she could’ve done, and it made me want to tear the whole damn world apart for letting it happen to her.
I understood. I knew how memories could dig and not let go. I knew how they’d follow you into the dark and whisper all the things you should’ve done. I knew how it could eat at you and seeing that she was going through that gutted me.
“You should’ve seen the way they looked at me like I was hope. Like I was about to save them. They thought they were going to be okay, but…”
“You can’t keep doing this to yourself, Dev. It wasn’t your fault.”
“But it was. I know that, and I have no doubt that girl knows it, too.” She gave me a bitter smile. “So, now, I stand in front of a classroom full of college kids, trying to teach them to follow the rules and not to make the same mistakes I did. Because I don’t want them haunted by the faces they couldn’t save.”
She finally looked up at me, trying to find some ground beneath her feet as she told me, “So, that’s the story… That’s why I left.”
“I’m glad you shared it with me.”
“I am, too.”
She didn’t deserve to carry this weight alone, and I wanted to take it all from her. The guilt. The memories. All of it. But I couldn’t. This was one of those times where she would have to find her own way through it on her own. But I would be there for her along the way, supporting her any way I could.
We sat there watching the fire for another hour or so, and when Devin yawned, I took that as my cue to get her inside. I put the lid on the fire and led her to the bedroom where I spent the better part of the night trying to help drown out the memories.
I held her a little tighter and kissed her a little longer, and she fell asleep curled up in my arms. Being careful not to wake her, I grabbed my phone and pulled up the file Shep had sent me weeks ago. I flipped to the back, and it was all there. The newspaper articles, the police reports, the pictures of her wounds. Those motherfuckers did a real number on her, and seeing the images made my blood boil.