Total pages in book: 52
Estimated words: 47822 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 239(@200wpm)___ 191(@250wpm)___ 159(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 47822 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 239(@200wpm)___ 191(@250wpm)___ 159(@300wpm)
I stared at them both, suddenly feeling exposed in a way that had nothing to do with physical nakedness. They saw me, really saw me, in a way few people ever had. Maybe they saw more than anyone. Well, besides Maggie. She’d wormed her way into my life without me even realizing it, and probably knew me better by now than I did myself. Knowing Crush and Byte had my number gave me a rush I wasn’t prepared for. Which only made me fall deeper under their spell. “I just want to have a good time,” I said finally, my voice barely above a whisper. “I want to enjoy this adventure, enjoy your company, without complications. Without heartbreak waiting at the end.”
The brothers exchanged another of those silent looks, a whole conversation happening in the space between heartbeats. “Fair enough.” Crush gave my hand a little squeeze before sitting back in his chair again. “No expectations. No complications.”
But something in the way he said the words, and the way Byte’s mouth curved into a half smile, told me they didn’t believe it any more than I did. Because it didn’t matter I’d only just met them; it didn’t even matter that there had been little to no physical contact among the three of us. Whatever was happening to us had already sailed past “uncomplicated” and was heading straight for uncharted waters. At least, it was emotionally. And despite all my protests, despite all my fears, a small, reckless part of me couldn’t wait to see where the current would take us.
Silence settled over us, broken only by the occasional snap of the fire. The confession about my fears had left me raw, exposed, but strangely lighter. Kind of like lancing a wound. I drew a deep breath and let it out slowly. If they were going to understand why I was the way I was, they deserved the whole story. “I grew up in the foster care system,” I said, my voice dropping to barely above a whisper. “It wasn’t horrible. I had good homes and a couple of foster grandmothers who loved to make me cookies just to see my eyes light up.” I smiled at the memory.
Crush shifted in his seat, his eyes intent on my face, while Byte remained perfectly still, a statue carved from shadow and firelight. Neither spoke, giving me space to continue at my own pace.
“As such, I had a few foster brothers and sisters,” I said, tugging the quilt higher until it covered me from chin to toes. “There was always more than one or two other kids besides me, all of us packed into these houses with foster parents who usually tried their best but needed the money they got for taking us in more than they wanted kids to look after. And the thing about being one of many is that you either learned to make yourself smaller so no one noticed you, or you became the loudest person in the room competing for attention. Any attention.”
Byte still held on to my hand and I stared down at our joined hands. “The loudest kids got attention. The prettiest ones got adopted. The troublemakers got noticed, even if it was the wrong kind of notice. But me? I was just… there. Taking up space. Getting passed over. All because I never found a place or people I felt like I belonged with. To be honest, I was OK with that. Still am.” I shook my head, debating how much to tell them. “Fuck it,” I muttered, taking a breath before I continued.
“I had this foster sister once. Jessie. She was beautiful. Golden hair, blue eyes, the kind of smile that could charm anyone. She’d been in the system longer than me, knew all the tricks. How to get the good clothes from donations, how to make the foster parents laugh. How to be seen.” I swallowed hard, the memory vivid despite the years. “I used to watch her, trying to figure out her secret. What made her so special? Why did everyone love her when they barely noticed me? I tried to copy the way she talked, the way she laughed. But it never worked for me. I was still just… background noise.” The fire hissed and popped, sending embers dancing up the chimney. I glanced off, stared into the flames instead of at the intense men sitting at the table with me.
“After a while, I stopped trying. I accepted that I was never going to be the star of anyone’s show. Which is when I discovered the upside to being invisible. No one notices when you leave.”
Byte’s grip on my hand loosened. Instead, he brushed his thumb over my fingers gently, stroking my skin in a soothing caress. “How old were you when you first ran?”