Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 86629 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 433(@200wpm)___ 347(@250wpm)___ 289(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 86629 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 433(@200wpm)___ 347(@250wpm)___ 289(@300wpm)
“You don’t understand.” His voice is low and menacing. He reaches one hand into his jacket pocket and I think he’s going for a gun or a knife, but that’s irrational. Why am I so afraid right now?
But what he brings out is so much worse.
He lays a diamond ring on the table between us.
I yank back from him, stunned. “What the hell is that?”
“We’re getting married today. I’ll make some calls. By this evening, you will be my wife.”
I shake my head wildly, waving my hands in the air. “No, no, no, no, that’s not happening. There’s no way we’re getting married! And why the hell are you carrying around a ring like that?!”
He ignores my question. “I’m not giving you an option, angel. You don’t understand what you just walked in to and I don’t have time to explain everything. We need to get married today, right now, or I can’t guarantee your safety.”
Safety?! What the hell?
“You’re really freaking me out.”
“There’s no other way. Fuck, I wish I could explain without making this worse, but please, you have to understand. I’m under constraints… constraints I don’t want… and there’s a clock ticking. I should be there right now, but…” He slams a hand palm-down against the table. I flinch, wrapping my arms around myself in terror. “Fuck. This is the worst timing possible.”
“I’m sorry,” I whisper, shrinking down, losing my internal battle.
I knew he’d hate me.
I knew I wasn’t good enough.
“You have nothing to apologize for, damn it, but we have to get married.”
I shove back from the table. “I can’t do that.”
“Angie—“
“No, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have come here.”
“Angie!”
I turn away, shaking as I hurry off. I almost run to the door, heart pounding, brain looping in a nasty refrain. Ugly, failure, not good enough, never good enough, doomed to be just like your mother. I breathe desperate gulps of fresh air but that doesn’t help—
Connor catches my wrist. I turn, pulling to get away, but he holds on like iron.
“Listen to me, angel.” He sounds desperate, but I don’t want to hear it.
“You’re only doing this because you feel bad. You think I’m some loser idiot who’s going to ruin your kid, and honestly, I don’t even blame you. But please, Connor, let me go.” Tears stream down my face. “You’re hurting me.”
He looks down at his hand like he’s only now realizing he’s holding onto me hard enough to leave bruises. He releases me and I stagger a couple steps, bumping my hip into a parking sign.
“I’m sorry,” he says, eyes wide with surprise. “I didn’t mean—“
“I don’t care, okay? God, this was so bad…”
“Angie, please.”
“We’re not getting married. I don’t even want anything from you. I just want you to be in the baby’s life, that’s all, okay? I want to be a better mother than I ever had. Please, we can talk more later, when we’ve both calmed down, okay?”
His hands ball into angry fists. His shoulders tighten as his eyes bore into me and the rage comes back. Fear slides down my spine as I back away from him.
“There is no later,” he says quietly. “You don’t get it. You don’t know what I have to do.”
“I’m sorry, but you’re not making sense. This was too much. We’ll talk later.”
I turn and run.
It’s not dignified. I’m not proud of myself. But I’m sure he’s going to beat me into a rotten pulp if I stand there for a second longer.
I cry as I go. I can’t believe that happened. The way he looked at me… his insane marriage proposal…
It’s like I broke him.
Like the idea of raising a baby with me destroyed his mind.
What a nightmare.
That was mortifying. So much worse than I ever pictured.
And I still have to make this work with him… somehow.
9
ANGIE
Ifeel like I got dragged behind a car for ten miles by the time I get back home.
I skipped the Uber. I partly walked, partly took the bus. Now I’m sweaty, exhausted, and emotionally drained. I texted Nadia because she was waiting to hear from me, but I couldn’t bring myself to tell her how awful it was.
Nadia: I’m so, so proud of you, Angie. I know that was hard, but you did the right thing.
God, she’s got no idea.
I keep thinking about Connor’s face on the way back to the apartment. The way it darkened, turned black, like he was filled with so much loathing and hate for me that he couldn’t contain it.
And that ring. Where the hell did he get that ring?
Like he knew I was coming and was ready for it.
I’m shaken when I step into the apartment. The place reeks like weed yet again. I open a couple windows and set up a fan to circulate clean air while my mother lounges in her bedroom, one leg hanging off the mattress, a lump of hair under her blankets.