Total pages in book: 116
Estimated words: 114068 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 570(@200wpm)___ 456(@250wpm)___ 380(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 114068 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 570(@200wpm)___ 456(@250wpm)___ 380(@300wpm)
I clear my throat. “I say this with love—”
“Oh, Jesus, what?”
“You’re too smart to torture yourself and Billie, yeah? So don’t do it. Not when we just got handed our dreams for the ranch on a silver platter. Combining Rivers Ranch with Lucky Ranch? That’s a huge win for us. Let’s not fuck it up before it even happens.”
Ryder’s grin fades. He raises his forearm so that his fingers brush the top of the doorframe and taps it. Once, twice. “Think you can stay away from Wheeler?”
I scoff. “I might not have much choice in the matter.”
“You do. And you won’t. Stay away from her, I mean. She isn’t gonna make it easy for you, but you’ll find a way to win her over.”
I take the turn onto the long stretch of country road that links our ranch with the Wallaces’. “Since when can you read the future?”
“I can read you. And I’ve been doing that since you and I were womb mates.”
“Ha.” It’s an old joke, one Dad used to make all the time.
A hollow feeling spreads through my center. Same sensation you get after being sucker punched. The grief—it’ll hit you out of nowhere like that.
“You think they’d want this for us?” I ask.
“Want what?”
“The life we got. All this.” I lift the fingers I have on the wheel and spread them, gesturing toward the pastures we pass.
“Yes and no. They’d be thrilled that we’re joining forces with the Lucks. But at the end of the day, I think they’d just want us to be happy. We’re all different, so happiness is gonna look different for each of us. For you, this”—he gestures out the window—“it definitely ain’t enough.”
“Ain’t enough for you either.”
His grin is back. “Not sure anything’ll ever be enough for me.”
That’s what I’m worried about.
Ryder and I are alike in so many ways. We both liked school. We’re both dreamers. In others, we’re different. Ryder is obsessed with music. I like it just fine, but I’ve never played an instrument, whereas Ryder plays several. He’s a picky eater, but I love food and will eat anything you put in front of me. I’m able to roll with the punches pretty easily, and I’m good at being spontaneous. Ryder thrives in the structure routine provides.
Problem is everyone sees how alike we look on the outside and thinks we’re alike on the inside too. It was always a struggle in school to get people to understand we were two different people with different personalities. I used to get bent out of shape about it.
Hard to feel special when you’re always lumped together with your brother. Really, with all four of my brothers. I lived in Cash’s and Wyatt’s and Sawyer’s shadows for most of my life. I think that’s part of the reason I want to get out of Hartsville so badly.
If I’m somewhere else, I can be somebody else. Someone other than Ryder’s twin or Cash’s kid brother. Maybe then I’ll finally be able to figure out what I want to do with my life.
“Give Wheeler space,” Ryder continues. “But not too much space. She likes what she sees in you. Just gotta give her time to learn to trust you and trust herself that she’s picking the right twin.”
I laugh. “Of course she’s picking the right twin. And that sounds an awful lot like threading the needle there.”
“I got faith in you.”
I turn my head to look at him. “I know. Appreciate that, brother.”
Ryder’s faith in me is what got me through losing my parents. He always checked in on me. Always made sure I ate, got rest, got home safe. Most of all, he didn’t make me feel like a pain in the ass for wanting something different out of life. For being curious about the world and how it worked. When we weren’t in the saddle, we were poring over the Rick Steves travel guides I got from the library or asking Garrett Luck how he managed the ranch’s finances. Ryder encouraged me to take computer classes in high school, which is how I became a whiz at Excel. I now do the lion’s share of the ranch’s accounting. He also enthusiastically agreed to spend a weekend with me in Mexico City when we graduated.
Ryder’s always been my partner in crime. But while my twin is curious about the world, he doesn’t share my burning desire to explore every inch of it. He’s content to do his cowboy thing.
No shame in that, considering he’s probably the best at it out of all of us. He’s just got a special touch with animals. With the land too.
“Now get off my ass about Billie,” Ryder says, interrupting my thoughts.
Problem is he’s gonna get himself into trouble with that girl. The second we arrive at the fancy new arena old man Wallace built on his property, Ryder’s out the door and smiling at Billie like she hung the goddamn moon.