Total pages in book: 102
Estimated words: 100493 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 502(@200wpm)___ 402(@250wpm)___ 335(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 100493 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 502(@200wpm)___ 402(@250wpm)___ 335(@300wpm)
My eyes burn when I don’t blink, afraid I’ll miss even a drop of Asher’s humanity.
He leans back in his chair instead, unbothered. “Are you done? Because I’ve got shit to do.”
I’ve cared too much these past couple of days. Years of training myself into a machine, and I still don’t know who I really am underneath. Am I really this destructive when it comes to people I love? I haven’t with Jord, or Punk.
Asher is my damn fucking kryptonite.
With as much zero fucks given attitude as I can muster, I walk back through the way I came, landing into a hard chest waiting outside the door.
Atlas looks between me and the asshole behind me. “What happened?”
My chest splits open, allowing a heavy drop of sadness in. “Nothing.”
“Ivy!” Asher calls, and I stop. “Tell Sinead they need to pack.”
CHAPTER
TEN
IVY
Thirty thousand feet above nothing, and if I fell from it right now it still wouldn’t match the constant spiral in my belly every time my eyes catch Asher.
Even now, asleep with his hood pulled low enough to hide his face, he’s got my organs on free-fall.
Stupid. Contaminated.
His breathing is in sync with mine. It used to be comforting to fall asleep on his chest, but now all I can think of is the bullet I put there.
I scroll my phone, switching between playlists I’ll never actually open, thumb hovering over one titled “For When You Fuck Everything Up.”
Seems appropriate.
Outside the window, clouds spread flat. We’re somewhere over the Atlantic, heading toward Désamour, toward Nonna, and my stomach knots over how he’s going to behave.
Will she get the Asher who took care of me, or the one who looks through me like I’m not even there?
I pull my knees to my chest in the leather seat, and there it is, the faint kickback of my gun. Smell the wet-iron reek of it. See his blood on my hands.
Why the fuck couldn’t I remember that I loved him.
Spotify blurs through the burn of my vision, but I fight the tears that threaten to spill.
Asher shifts in his sleep, jaw going tight. Even unconscious he’s violence-ready, and that’s because of me. I did this. Turned him from prince to villain.
The pilot hits the cabin intercom. “Beginning our descent into Désamour. Twenty minutes to landing.”
He peels his eyes open, that blue-white stare on mine across the cabin, and my ribs lock.
Minutes pass, or maybe seconds, then the jolt of landing breaks the stare-down.
Désamour’s airstrip runs gray and wet under February drizzle.
Home.
Only, when the word passes through me, I feel nothing.
Daniel and Sinead are already posted at the cars as we slow to a stop.
Why the fuck is he still looking at me like that?
His thumb skims over his lower lip, focus still on me. “You look worried.”
I dig my nails into my palms. “I am.”
“Well don’t be.” He leans forward, resting his elbows on his thighs. “My performance will be almost as good as yours.”
My mouth drops open. “Asher.”
Swinging a duffle over his shoulder, he stands to his full height. “What? Isn’t that what we do now?”
He kicks the door open. “Perform. Play our parts.” A rough laugh slips out of him. “Since we’re both such good fucking actors.”
He gives me no room to answer, already heading out the exit.
My performance will be almost as good as yours.
We turn onto a dirt road, and I feel myself slowly relax. Vines wind up the weathered walls, the house rising from the roll of mountains. We stop outside, and Daniel heads straight for the trunk.
I shove my door open.
Gravel crunches under my boots as I step into the old driveway. It’s been years since I’ve been back here, yet it feels like yesterday that I left.
Shivers wrack through me and I run my hands up and down my arms. Colder than I remember, yet warmth still exists here and I’m guessing it has nothing to do with the weather and everything to do with who’s inside.
Asher closes his door with a thud and rounds my side, his face completely blank.
Daniel lifts my duffel. “You good?”
“I’ll be fine,” I say, but my smile falls a second too early.
The front door swings open before we reach it, and Nonna steps out with a bright smile. “Ma petite!”
I walk straight into her arms. “Nonna,” I breathe.
She smells of jasmine and silver. Like home.
Her hands cup my cheeks, her hazel eyes softening as she studies me. “You look tired, chérie.”
I sigh, squeezing her grip. “I’m fine.”
She kisses my forehead, smiling like she knows better. “Liar.”
Turning, she looks at the stranger I dragged to her door. “And you must be...”
“Asher.” He dips his head, kissing her knuckles with a small smirk. “Enchanté, Madame.”
Bastard. I see what he’s doing.
She clicks her tongue. “Un vrai gentleman.” Waving us toward the hall, she adds, “Come, come inside.”