Total pages in book: 114
Estimated words: 109368 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 547(@200wpm)___ 437(@250wpm)___ 365(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 109368 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 547(@200wpm)___ 437(@250wpm)___ 365(@300wpm)
49. Ramsay
Silver lay in my arms, her cheek to my chest, her fingers trailing up and down the ridge between my pecs. Akiva had finally ventured into the room and sprawled herself across the foot of the bed.
Utter repletion and contentment glued me to the mattress and to the woman in my arms.
“Ramsay’s an alias?”
The question surprised me, but it also didn’t. More than anything it surprised me it had taken her this long to ask. “Aye. But it was my middle name.”
“Will you tell me your birth name? I promise I won’t tell anyone.”
Only the agency knew my birth name. Yet I found myself replying, “Logan. Logan Ramsay Ferguson.”
“Oh.”
“What?”
“You … you’re definitely more of a Ramsay McRae than a Logan Ferguson.”
I chuckled. “Is that right?”
Silver nodded, her tone serious. “Yes. You will always be Ramsay McRae to me.”
I smoothed a hand down over her hip, her skin like warm silk beneath my calloused palm. “Aye, me too. This is the first place I ever really felt like me. The real me. So, aye. You’re stuck with me as Ramsay forever.”
“I know we got a little carried away during and post-sex … but, uh, we should probably talk about the forever stuff,” Silver whispered tentatively.
I tensed. “Meaning?”
“We haven’t spoken about what we both want. I know there’s an age gap so … I know it’s too soon to be talking about it, but I think we should know if there’s even a future for us before we get any deeper into this.”
At her nervous words, I tilted her chin to look into her eyes.
She seemed wary. Uncertain.
“Spit it out, angel.”
“I want kids,” she blurted. And then winced. “Not right away. But I want … I want a family.”
Ah.
Of course, my Silver wanted a family. After she’d lost so much of it.
I relaxed and her eyes widened as she felt my response.
“Do you?”
“Honestly?” I caressed her cheek with my knuckles. “I never thought a family was in my future. I never let myself dream about it. Until you.”
“Really?”
“Before the marines, before MI6 … I used to think about meeting the right person and having kids with her. Creating a family for myself again after losing mine.”
Silver pressed a slow kiss to my chest over my heart.
“I … I don’t talk about it a lot. Losing my parents. Because it’s hard. Everything I’ve been through and the terrible things I’ve seen people do … and losing them is still the worst thing I’ve ever experienced.”
Emotion trembled on her lips, and I knew she understood better than anyone.
“I don’t talk about them a lot and that’s the way it is.” I gave her a squeeze so she knew it wasn’t because I didn’t trust her.
Silver nodded in understanding.
“Giving up the idea of making a family for myself again was one of the hardest sacrifices I made for the job.”
She pushed up, resting her chin on her hand on my shoulder. “And now?”
“It’s hard for me to wrap my head around the thought.” I gently pushed her onto her back, smoothing her hair away from her gorgeous face. “But I’d want that with you. I see that with you. You. Me. Kids.”
“Akiva.” Silver grinned, biting her lip in that fucking adorable way of hers.
So happy.
She looked so happy.
It was difficult to believe I was the reason.
“And Akiva.”
“So, kids … yes?”
I nodded, heat flooding through me as I slipped my hand between us to tease her pussy. “We’ll have a lot of fun trying too.”
She gasped, arching into my touch. “When we’re ready. I want you all to myself for a while.”
I kissed her in savage possessiveness I kept on a tight leash, pushing my fingers into her snug, wet heat. My want for this woman had never dulled, only grown exponentially, and I wondered if it would always be like this. Or if it would eventually ease into something that felt more manageable to bear.
As I settled between her legs, as she opened to me, I thought, Fuck being able to bear it. This uncontrollable want was the best fucking thing I’d ever—
An alarm blared from behind the wall, jerking us apart.
Disbelief coursed through me.
Silver’s eyes were round with uncertainty. “What is that?”
“My perimeter sensor alarm.” I rolled off her and hit the wall light. The door to the hidden room opened and the motion sensor lights blared to life along with my monitors.
“Ramsay, what is going on?” I could sense Silver in the doorway.
“I have perimeter sensors set all over the island. Except at the crossing, though I have a camera there. If someone gets on my island from a less conspicuous point, I’ll know.” I clicked through the camera images of nighttime on Stòr. There was nothing at the main crossing because the tide was in.
“There.” Silver reached past me pointing to the third computer screen. In the top right-hand corner, the camera attached to the outside of the white cottage showed movement. Clicking on it, I dragged the timeline back a few minutes and saw the small boat pull up at my dock there. The infrared revealed three figures climbing off the dock and onto the island.