Total pages in book: 77
Estimated words: 72421 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 362(@200wpm)___ 290(@250wpm)___ 241(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 72421 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 362(@200wpm)___ 290(@250wpm)___ 241(@300wpm)
“Hey,” I say. He’s sitting by the fireplace, a book in his hand.
“Join me?” He pats the seat next to his. “I know you’ve been avoiding this conversation, and it’s past due.”
I sit down next to him.
“You know I’m sorry.” I do know that. “I should have stopped, and I could give you a million reasons why I felt I needed to keep doing it, but I won’t.”
I already know the reasons. He likes to kill, and he also wanted the money from those kills. The people he offed might have had it coming, but it still turned our lives upside down. The money was useless when we couldn’t have each other.
“I’ve missed you terribly. It didn’t matter that you were close.” He takes my hand in his. “You are the only person I have ever cared for, and I’ll do whatever it takes to be able to stay in your life somehow.”
“You’d stop killing?”
“If you asked.”
“You can’t stay here and be killing random people.”
“Random?”
“You know what I mean.”
“If you want me to stop, then I will.” He says it so easily, without hesitation.
“I want you to stop.”
“It’s done.” I reach up and brush a piece of graying hair off his forehead. He’s due for a cut. I’ve dreamed of this moment. Of him choosing me over himself. It’s as though I can breathe a little easier now.
“Then you can stay. Z is going to see about getting you a new identity and whatever that all entails. Are you okay with that?”
“It’s hard to take handouts from people, but I will so that I can stay close to you, Bonte. There isn’t much I wouldn’t do if you simply asked.” He sounds a lot like Eros. I suppose they do have more than a few things in common. It might be what I’m drawn to.
“It’s more of a handout to me. They’re doing it for Eros and me.”
“They’re doing it for you because they know their son won’t let you go, and if you did leave, he’d follow.”
"They are good people, and they will be my family one day, and if what you're saying is all true about stopping and staying here, then they'll be yours too."
"I know. War, Z, Ronan, and Eros already had a conversation with me." I try to read his expression, but I can't. I’m not shocked by this in the least. Eros is very protective of me.
"You don't think it would be nice to have a family? One that's bigger than only us?"
"I want to see you happy." His eyes soften at the corners, revealing the lines that have formed since I last saw him all those years ago. “And I see that they not only make you happy, but they will also protect you.” His lips pull up on one side. “Even from me, sweetheart.”
I swipe at the tear that escapes. It’s been so long since he’s called me that.
“I won’t need protection from you.”
“You won’t. I have more than learned my lesson.”
“I love you.” I lean over, hugging him.
“I love you too, sweetheart.” He kisses my cheek. “Don’t fret over me. It will all get worked out.” I trust that it will.
I pull my legs up into my seat and reminisce with him, even telling him about Eros. I'm not sure how long we talk, maybe a few hours before he starts to grow tired and needs to take another round of pain meds.
I help him over to the bed and make sure he's settled before I step out into the hallway where Eros has been lingering.
“He’s staying,” I tell him.
“I know.”
“He already told you?”
Eros pulls me into him, wrapping his arms around me tightly. “No, but I knew he’d choose you. Who wouldn’t?” His expression lets me know he really thinks everyone on planet Earth would pick me. I didn’t know this kind of love was real.
I don’t think you can have that deep of an adoration for a person who doesn’t have a darkness inside of them. Knowing they’d cross any line for you, no matter the cost, as long as that cost isn’t you.
The dark isn’t so scary anymore. I see now that I'm a lure to it, giving me all the control I would ever need.
For so long I have worried if that darkness lived inside me, but now I realize it's all around me, and I need it as much as it needs me. There is no denying that when I see what a simple touch from me can do to Eros. I reach up now and cup his cheek. He leans into it. He always does, like a moth to the flame. Only I can ever burn him, but I never will.
“I think now that we all know where everyone stands, it might be time for my punishment.” I smirk, more than ready for my spanking, because I too need Eros's touch.