Total pages in book: 124
Estimated words: 119476 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 597(@200wpm)___ 478(@250wpm)___ 398(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 119476 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 597(@200wpm)___ 478(@250wpm)___ 398(@300wpm)
The door swings open and Atlas steps into the room. “We’ve been over this, Pip. While you’re here, it’s yours.”
“It doesn’t feel right.” I push against the mattress so I’m sitting all the way up. “It feels like I’m pushing you out of your own space and—”
“Nora.” Atlas is across the room and at the side of the bed in the blink of an eye. “I know it’s hard, but I need you to let me take care of you.”
“Why?” I whisper, struggling to understand the reason he cares as much as he does. Is it some kind of misplaced guilt over what his dad did to me, or is it something else entirely?
He lifts a hand, like maybe he’s going to reach for me, before letting it drop again. “I know it doesn’t make sense, but I… It’s just something I need to do.”
“Like a compulsion?” I don’t know why I asked him that. I’m not sure I really want to know the answer. The thought of him thinking of me as some kind of obligation makes me feel about two inches tall.
It’s probably dumb, but I want us to be equals, because if life with Rand taught me anything, it’s that relationships—even friendships—with a power imbalance rarely work out.
And after being on my own for so long, I really want Atlas to be my friend.
“Sort of.” He shrugs his broad shoulders. “But not in the way you’re thinking.”
I clutch the covers to my chest, uncertainty winding its way around my heart like thorny vines, pricking at me until tears fill my eyes. “Can you explain it to me?”
“Nora, no, don’t cry.” Atlas reaches out and brushes his thumbs under my eyes. “Please, Pip. Your tears kill me.”
Something inside of me short circuits when he tries to pull his hand away from my face, and before I can think better of it, I reach out and grab his wrist, holding his hand in place.
I feel kind of like I’m losing it, but at the same time, the thought of him no longer touching my cheek is almost unbearable.
What is wrong with me?
Atlas glances down at where my fingers circle around his wrist. “Talk to me, Nora. What’s going on?”
My cheeks heat as I ponder how to explain this to him without sounding a few cards shy of a full deck. He’s always so careful around me, so how on earth do I tell him that his touch grounds me, that the feel of his skin against mine makes me feel safe? How?
“I like it when you touch me,” I blurt out, my entire body heating in embarrassment. “Wait, no. That’s not what I meant. I—”
“What did you mean then?” He glances down at me, an amused smile playing on his lips as he brushes his thumb along the edge of my jaw.
I release my hold on him in favor of burying my face in my hands. He probably thinks I’m some kind of stage-five clinger.
“Hey.” He peels my hands away from my face before cupping both of my cheeks. It takes my all not to melt into a puddle of goo at the soft look on his face. “Whatever you’re thinking, stop it.”
“I’m just humiliated because—”
“Why?” he scoffs. “Because you told me you liked it when I touched you? I’m fucking thrilled you told me. It’s been hell holding myself back every time I wanted to reach out and comfort you. But now I know you’re okay with it, because you spoke up and told me. Don’t you get it? You ask, I deliver. You want me to touch you, Nora?”
It takes me a second, but when I realize he’s waiting on a response, I nod.
“Good, because guess what, Pip”—he lowers himself down so that he’s sitting on the edge of the bed—“I definitely like touching you, too.”
Now my body feels hot for a totally different reason. His deep voice combined with his kind eyes—yeah, I’m feeling things I’ve never really felt before. Things I’m not even sure how to quantify. Almost like every bit of blood in my body is rushing to the space between my legs.
I’m tingling all over, and I think I like it. Which is wild.
I’m sure I’m just reading way into what he’s saying. Way, way into it. He’s just being a nice guy. Get a grip, Nora!
“It makes me feel safe,” I whisper, dragging my lower lip between my teeth as I look down at my lap. “Like nothing can hurt me as long as you’re near.”
Acting braver than I feel, I peek up at Atlas from beneath my lashes. Much to my surprise, a wide, victorious smile curls his lips.
“Do you know how fucking good it feels to hear you say that? Pip, I feel like I’m on top of the world knowing that my presence does that for you.” He places his hand on my knee over the top of the covers and squeezes once. “Like Superman.”