Total pages in book: 153
Estimated words: 152064 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 760(@200wpm)___ 608(@250wpm)___ 507(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 152064 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 760(@200wpm)___ 608(@250wpm)___ 507(@300wpm)
She tips her head up and regards me with empathy. “You must have had a good reason to keep such a big secret for so long.” I start to tell her the same story I told Tristan, but she puts her hand on my arm. “What caused it to fall apart?”
“She didn’t want me, she wanted the life I could afford her.”
Sadness washes over her. “I’m so sorry you had to carry that hurt with you for so long on your own. You can let it go now, though.”
All this fear has been weighing me down, holding me back.
I keep expecting everyone’s anger, but all I get is compassion.
Maybe I should extend a little of my own to myself.
CHAPTER 51
TALLY
I’m anxious. Bringing my pro-hockey boyfriend who plays for my dad’s team to family dinner was already going to be awkward, but post ex-wife reveal, it’s unlocked a new level of anxiety. Everything between me and Phillip feels off. I’m used to him being doting, but all our interactions seem steeped in uncertainty. We’re walking on eggshells. I’m hyper-alert and hypersensitive to everything he says and does. Is he being honest? Is he protecting me? How does he feel? How do I feel?
It’s only been a couple of days, and he leaves on an away series tomorrow. Spending the evening under my parents’ microscope isn’t what I want, but there’s no getting out of it, so here we are. I run my hands down my thighs and take a deep breath as we pull into the driveway of my childhood home. It’s not just the Phillip situation weighing on me. My family isn’t a whole anymore, but we’re all together in this space, and it makes me feel even more unbalanced.
“You okay?” Phillip shifts the car into park.
I consider lying, but then I’m doing what I’ve accused him of, and what’s the point in that? “No. I’m nervous. They’re going to grill you, and it probably won’t be an easy dinner.”
Phillip squeezes my hand. “I’ve been grilled plenty. I can handle it.”
“This is a little different than the media, though,” I hedge.
“It is, but I want to put your mom at ease. It’ll be okay.” He kisses the back of my hand. “Your mom is important to you, and you’re very important to her. I’ve already made a lot of bad impressions, so tonight I’d like to make some good ones,” he admits. “What are you most worried about?”
“I want my family to like you.” It’s not nearly that simple, but it’s all I can give him right now. I need them not to make this harder than it already is, and Fenna can be very blunt sometimes.
“Me too.” He leans over and kisses my cheek. “I think your sister is watching us through the window.”
I spot her peeking through the living room curtains. “We should go in.”
Phillip grabs the bottle of wine for dinner and the flowers for my mom before we exit the car.
I knock, but let myself in, calling out as we leave our shoes at the front door. Hubert, the rescue dog they recently adopted, barrels down the steps and bounces around. Mom follows, commanding him to sit. He immediately complies, looking up at her as she pets his head.
Phillip smiles, but it’s not the one he gives the media, it’s a little nervous and hopeful. “Hi, Mrs. Vander Zee, thank you so much for inviting me over. These are for you, and this is for dinner.” He holds out the flowers and the wine.
“How very thoughtful, these are lovely.” Mom takes the flowers and wine. “Thank you. It’s nice to finally meet you outside of the news outlets and the hockey games.”
I give my mom a look. She ignores it. Phillip runs his fingers down the back of my arm.
“I’m sure you have a lot of questions and I’m happy to answer them.”
Mom gives him her practiced yes you will smile.
My stomach churns with fresh nerves as she guides us through the living room to the kitchen.
Fenna is waiting expectantly, and Ties has his phone in his hand. He slips it in his pocket as we enter the room.
“Hey.” Phillip raises a hand. “You must be Fenna and Ties.”
“You’re Flip Madden,” Fenna says.
Ties elbows her.
“What?” Fenna rolls her eyes at our brother. “He is.”
“You don’t have to use his last name,” Ties mutters.
“Everyone does it with Connor Grace,” Phillip offers.
Dad comes in, wearing an apron that reads GRILLING IS MY SUPERPOWER. “Tally-Bear, when did you and my personal PR nightmare arrive?” I think he means for it to come out as a joke, but his tone lacks humor.
“Why don’t we pour some drinks and get comfortable in the living room?” Mom suggests.
“I’ll open the wine!” And possibly just add a straw to the bottle.
“There’s a bottle of white in the fridge,” Mom says.