Total pages in book: 153
Estimated words: 152064 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 760(@200wpm)___ 608(@250wpm)___ 507(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 152064 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 760(@200wpm)___ 608(@250wpm)___ 507(@300wpm)
CHAPTER 54
TALLY
Ihave three exams under my belt and one more to write tomorrow. The last two were much smoother than the first, with no alarm glitches, panic attacks, or falling asleep when I’m not supposed to. I’m also grateful that the Terror have won their last two away games, with Phillip scoring three goals. Their final away game is tomorrow night in Chicago. If they win it, they’ll have home-ice advantage for the start of the playoffs. My written exam will be over before the game, so all my focus can shift to my showcase and hoping my boyfriend will be in the city when it happens, rather than on a plane to somewhere else.
My textbook is open in front of me, a selection of highlighters, sticky flags, and flash cards surround me, as well as a bag of dropjes sent two days ago from Phillip.
Parsnip hops down from his perch on the cat tower and bumbles down the hall at the sound of the door opening.
“Escapee on his way to you!” I shout.
“All good!” Fee calls back.
Yesterday, he slipped out, and we spent fifteen minutes luring him back with treats.
She appears a moment later carrying a box. “It’s from Roman and Lexi.” She sets it on the counter. “And Rix.” She holds up the card attached to it. “And apparently Flip.”
I abandon my textbook and cue card making to check out the contents and the note.
Fee and Tally,
Sending you both tons of love on your finals. The balanced meals are from Roman, the cream puffs are from Lexi, and Black Forest-inspired food items and the cherry chip cupcakes with cherry icing are courtesy of my brother. ;)
Love and hugs,
Rix
I hug the card to my chest and bite my lips together.
Fee wraps her arms around me. “Got a case of the big feels?”
“Yeah.” The pause felt necessary, essential even, so I could focus on exams and dance, instead of my relationship and all the fears and hopes that come with it. Phillip has been giving me space, which I need, but he’s still taking care of me from a distance. A comfy new hoodie arrived two days ago, and now the study snacks. He’s telling me he’s here for me. In return, I overnighted one of his t-shirts I’ve been sleeping in to his hotel in Chicago. It’s a little thing, but I want him to know I care.
Fee and I send a message to the Babe chat with a picture of our box of goodies and a thank you.
Rix
Happy to help with brain fuel.
Essie
Oooh. Those cupcakes look delicious.
Rix
There might be extras if Tristan hasn’t already found the ones I hid in the freezer.
Hemi
Hammer, have you left for the office yet?
Hammer
I have not.
Rix
LOL. I can meet you at street level in ten with office fuel!
A photo of a plastic container full of cupcakes follows.
Shilpa
I’m so glad I’m in the office today!
Lexi
I will be stopping by for lunch.
A slew of good luck messages and can’t wait to see you dance this weekend follow.
Fee and I heat up one of the dinners and settle in to eat while studying. My phone buzzes with messages from my parents, checking in. I told my mom about the pause, but with my dad out of town and also my boyfriend’s coach, I felt like I should leave that alone.
I scroll back to the last messages from Phillip.
I’m in this with you, whatever you need.
I know in my heart this was the right decision. As soon as I made it and put it out in the world, I felt lighter, even though it makes my heart hurt. But after nearly a week of separation, the pull toward him is undeniable, maybe because the stress of exams is lifting.
My fingers hover over the keys for a few seconds before I type the message and hit send.
CHAPTER 55
FLIP
My anxiety has been tough to handle the last few days. My stomach is in my throat as a message pops up from Tally. I take a centering breath and send a silent plea to outside forces to please not fuck with me today before I click on it.
Tally
I miss you.
The wash of relief is overwhelming. Saying yes to a pause was the single most difficult thing I’ve ever done, and that’s saying something since I filed for divorce and forked over my entire first-year salary to get Fiona out of my life. But giving Tally space to breathe has been infinitely more challenging. It’s been good for me, too, though. Separation brings perspective. I respond right away.
Flip
I miss you, too, kitten.
She hearts the message.
Tally
I needed the space, but I don’t like the space.
The relief almost takes me to my knees. She’s one exam away from being finished, and then it’s just her showcase. The pressure of school will be off soon, and then we can focus on us.