Total pages in book: 153
Estimated words: 152064 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 760(@200wpm)___ 608(@250wpm)___ 507(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 152064 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 760(@200wpm)___ 608(@250wpm)___ 507(@300wpm)
I have several messages from my brother.
Ties
Can you message when you’re home, just so we all know you’re safe?
Mom has tried to call you six times. I said you’re probably with your Tilton friends.
Mom called one of the Terror women called Hammer. Why is her name Hammer? Apparently you were with her so she knows you’re safe and so do I. But still message when you get this.
Tallulah, for fuck’s sake, just message.
The most recent one is less than half an hour old.
I call him.
“Tallulah?”
“Sorry I’m only getting back to you now. I didn’t mean to make you worry. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. Well, not really. But you’re okay? You’re safe?”
“Yeah. How are you? I’m sorry I bailed last night.” I feel guilty all over again for walking out.
“I would have done the same if I could. I did once we finally got Fenna out of the bathroom.” His voice sounds rough.
“You go to a friend’s?”
“Jordan from robotics picked me up from the restaurant.”
“You stay the night at their place?”
“Just went to the Hooded Goblin for a while and hung out. When I got home, Dad’s truck was gone.”
“I’m sorry, Ties.” What a gut punch to come home to that.
“Me too.” He sighs. “But it wasn’t the surprise for me that it was for you. Things have been…strained for a while.”
“Why didn’t anyone say anything? Why didn’t Mom?” That part is hardest to stomach.
“What could she say? That she wasn’t happy with Dad? You’re in your final year at Tilton, these dance showcases are like, way more involved than I could have realized, and you have courses on top of that, and a life of your own. I don’t think she wanted to put more on you.”
“She doesn’t usually keep things from me.”
“I know you two are close, Talls, but it was never your job to be our other parent. I love you for stepping up when Dad didn’t, but that shouldn’t have been on you, and maybe Mom realized that, too.”
I rub my temple. I don’t know how to feel about any of this. “How is Mom?”
“Sad. Tired. Maybe a little relieved. She’s putting on a brave face, but she has puffy eyes, so she’s feeling it like the rest of us.”
“How about Fenna?” Maybe I should have gone to the house last night, stayed with my family instead of running away. But it was a bomb I didn’t expect.
“Fenna’s confused. She’s been playing her cello all day. It’s the most depressing shit, even if it’s flawless.” He sighs. “I wish I’d taken the early uni placement instead of waiting until fall.”
“I’m sorry this is happening.” I can’t fix this for any of us. I’m used to manageable problems, like broken bows or a trip to the robotics store.
“Me, too. But we can’t make them stay together.”
“No. I guess we can’t.”
“I gotta get ready. I have robotics in an hour, and I still need to shower and eat.”
“I love you, Ties.”
“I love you, too, Talls.”
We end the call, and I rub my chest. My heart hurts for my brother. How much of my slack has he had to pick up? Did he stay back this coming semester because Mom needed the support I wasn’t there to provide? I’m angry at her all over again for leaving me on the outside of something so huge, but Ties isn’t wrong. I was the second mom of the house, and everyone let me assume that role. And it’s the one I’m used to taking on. I send Fenna a text apologizing for leaving last night.
Fenna
I wanted to leave too, but I didn’t know the bus route home.
Poor Fen. She was stuck at home while both Ties and I could escape.
Tally
Do you want to talk?
Fenna
Not right now. I’m practicing. Maybe later?
Tally
Okay. I’m here if you need me. I love you.
Fenna
I love you, too.
Fenna takes time to process, so it could be a few days before the reality hits her and she needs airtime.
I move on to the unanswered messages from my friends. I have several from Fee, which started last night, asking if I was coming home. Another one time-stamped half an hour later reads:
Fee
Cammie messaged Essie, who said your parents are getting a divorce. I’m so sorry.
She also said you did shots and FLIP TOOK YOU HOME.
But you are not here, so that means you’re with him.
The next one is time-stamped an hour ago:
Fee
Went for breakfast with Cammie. Message us when you get this.
I’ll get to that in a minute, because my Babe chat is pinging relentlessly, asking if I’m okay this morning and sending me hugs.
I send a *marching band GIF* and a *crying into my wineglass GIF*.
Tally
Hydrating!
I add a photo of my Vitamin Water. There will be no photographic evidence of my face this morning.
My dad has texted and left a voicemail and so has my mom. I’m too upset to deal with them while I’m this hungover. I return to my messages with Fee and Cammie.