It Kills Me (Betrayal #1) Read Online Penelope Sky

Categories Genre: Alpha Male, Contemporary, Dark, Forbidden, Mafia Tags Authors: Series: Betrayal Series by Penelope Sky
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Total pages in book: 80
Estimated words: 77683 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 388(@200wpm)___ 311(@250wpm)___ 259(@300wpm)
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I sat down, crossing my legs with my hands folded in my lap.

He sat beside me and said nothing. “Getting shit-faced isn’t the answer. And getting fucked isn’t either.”

“Come on.” My hand moved to his thigh, hidden from view by the table, and I slowly moved it up, feeling the muscles in his thigh through the fabric. I propped my elbow on the table, and I watched his face, seeing his reaction to me. “This is what you wanted, isn’t it?”

He let my hand explore him for a moment before he took a deep breath. Then he forced himself to grab my hand and hold it on his knee. “I’m not a rebound. I’m not second best. I’m not going to fuck a woman while she thinks about another man.”

Another rush of embarrassment flooded through me, and I pulled my hand away. “Then why are you here?” I looked around the room, seeing everyone mingling, so rich that the only problem they had was deciding which piece of art belonged in their mansions.

“Because I’m your friend.”

“You’re the one who said we aren’t friends.”

“Friends don’t want to fuck each other,” he said. “And right now, that’s the last thing I want.”

I continued to look away, busying myself by watching everyone else have a good time.

“Did you actually like him? Or did he just wound your pride?”

“Both.”

“Did you love him?”

I didn’t say anything.

“That’s a no.”

“I’ve never had a real relationship because this is always a problem. Once they realize who I really am, who my father really is, they want nothing to do with me. Ryan said it didn’t bother him, so I thought he was different. But I guess he’s not.”

“Because you’re dating pussies. Not real men.”

“Maybe.” I searched the table for a drink, but nothing was there. The burn of the whiskey was still on my tongue and in my throat.

“You can’t run an empire with a pussy by your side.”

“I told you I don’t need a man⁠—”

“Trust me, when it’s the right man, you’ll need him more than anything,” he said. “But boys like Ryan and whoever else came before him…they can’t give you what you need. Forget them. You’re the most beautiful woman in this room, and you’re wounded by some kid who didn’t deserve you in the first place. Buck up.”

“Buck up?” I looked at him again, my eyebrows raised.

“You heard what I said. You think your father would ever let anyone know how much they hurt him?” He shook his head. “He’d brush it off and move on.” He snapped his fingers. “Just like that. Now, get up, get a drink, and get over it.”

I looked at myself in the mirror for a moment, staring at the blush on my cheeks, the dark eye shadow across my eyelids, and the mascara that made my lashes prominent. I’d looked at myself a million times and never considered myself beautiful. I was confident in my appearance, carried myself like someone worthwhile, but beautiful…that was a strong word. Right now, I looked meek, wounded by the bullet holes no one could see.

I didn’t shed a tear because I was far too proud for that, but my face looked puffy all the same. My eyes were empty, like I didn’t want to be there, when I’d been excited about this for the last few days.

I finally left the bathroom and walked down the hallway.

“Sweetheart.” My father appeared before me, his hands in the pockets of his trousers.

I forced a smile on to my lips. “Hey, Dad. Nice tux.”

“Thanks. I love the gold.”

“Thanks.” I wore a gown made of gold fabric with gold earrings and matching shoes. I always joked I would wear a gold wedding dress and make everyone wear white—and he said he loved that.

“Where’s Ryan?”

“Oh…he couldn’t make it.” I’d known he would ask about him, but I still wasn’t prepared for the bald-faced lie I’d just told.

My father saw right through it. “He wasn’t right for you anyway.”

I didn’t know how he knew. Maybe his men saw Ryan leave and reported back to him. Or maybe he’d watched our conversation unfold from across the room. I didn’t ask. “He couldn’t accept my lifestyle.”

“It’s not for everyone.”

“It’s not for most people, it seems.”

“The right man will come along, sweetheart. I’m sorry you had to go through that in the middle of a party. Not the gentlemanly thing to do.”

“Well, I kinda pulled it out of him.”

“Because you see things from a mile away, just like I do.” He stepped closer to me and hugged me, his powerful arms locking me inside a steel-bar cage. He held me like that for several seconds, making me feel safe, before he released me. “Dinner is about to be served. I saw that they have gnocchi.”

“Because you asked for gnocchi.”

He smiled. “You got me.”


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