Total pages in book: 113
Estimated words: 106772 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 534(@200wpm)___ 427(@250wpm)___ 356(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 106772 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 534(@200wpm)___ 427(@250wpm)___ 356(@300wpm)
While rushing out of her room, I slipped my earbuds in and accepted the call. “This is Toni,” I said, acting professionally.
“It’s Brendan.”
“Hi, what’s up?”
“Can you do a virtual today, around three?”
This could’ve been an email. I tapped my screen and looked at my calendar. Cutter had practice after school, so I didn’t have to rush home for him, and my mom was still here to get Nova off the bus.
“Yes, that works. My calendar should be updated for you to see.”
“It is . . . but I wanted to talk to you.”
“About work?”
“No, Toni. About us.”
There wasn’t an us anymore.
“I know you’re upset with me, and I get it. Miriam’s important to you, but I want you to think about what you’re giving up if you decide to become guardian of her children. Nova’s what, five? Do you really want to raise someone for the next thirteen years? And how will you pay for Cutter to go to college? I really want you to think about this because it affects both of us.”
I saw red. Was he serious? I didn’t know which tidbit to tackle first.
“Brendan, you asked if I was choosing the kids over you, and I said yes. I didn’t hesitate or second-guess myself. This is where I want to be, with them, guiding them through life the way their mom would’ve wanted. Cutter and Nova are a part of my life and always have been. They’re not going away. They need me as much as I need them. As far as us . . .” I inhaled deeply and stared out the window, into the parking lot. “My heart isn’t broken because you’re not in my life, Brendan. I think we haven’t loved each other for a long time and were just comfortable in our relationship.”
“I do love you.”
“I appreciate that, but I don’t love you. Not in the way you deserve to be loved, and I honestly don’t see a relationship working between us. I’ll always want something you can’t give and wonder if you’re going to bail because we don’t see eye to eye on a future together. And you’ll always want something I can’t give, and that’s my undivided attention. The kids will always have that from me. This is where my heart is.”
Brendan groaned and then let out a long-exasperated sigh. He wasn’t used to women breaking up with him. “See you at three,” he said and hung up. I wished we could go back to the days of hearing a dial tone when someone hung up on you because that would’ve been better than the dead air of a failed relationship.
On my way back to Miri’s room, one of the nurses told me we had visitors. I didn’t know whether to thank her or cringe that she wasn’t considering me a guest.
Chatter emanated from Miri’s room, and I heard laughter. I needed to take more videos of her before it was too late. We were almost out of time, and I wasn’t even close to being ready. I went in, with a fake smile on my face, and was pleasantly surprised to find Samira and Vera there.
“Good morning,” I said to all of them. “How was your nap?” I walked over to Miri and stroked her hair. Some of it had started falling out, but we weren’t to worry about that right now.
“The meds make me tired.”
And sick, weak, and translucent.
“I know, sweetie.” I turned to face the others. “It’s nice to see you ladies.”
“We’re here for the deets,” Samira said.
“Deets? About what?”
Vera waggled her finger at me. “Don’t you dare play coy with us.”
“I’m far from shy, Vera. But I do wish you’d enlighten me on these so-called deets.”
“She’s worse than you,” Samira said to Miri.
Miri laughed, and I had the keen sense of mind to keep up whatever this was just so I could hear her laugh. I raised my eyebrow at her, hoping she could tell me what in the hell her friends were going on about.
“They want to know about your date,” Miri said happily.
“What date?”
“The one with Mr. Eligible,” Vera said as she fanned herself. “I’ve tried to set him up with my daughter, but nope. He wasn’t interested. But you come to town, and our boy is smitten.”
I held my hand up. “Is ‘Mr. Eligible’ Weston?”
“Of course he is,” Vera said.
“We didn’t go on a date.”
“Yes, you did!” Miri blurted out. “He asked you to dinner, picked you up, and brought you back after curfew.”
Vera’s and Samira’s mouths dropped open. I rolled my eyes and sat down with a huff.
“We went to dinner. It wasn’t a date.” Or was it? He’d picked me up, treated me like we were on a date, and even kissed me at the end of the night—albeit on my cheek, but still, his lips touched some part of my skin, which was close to my mouth. And I may have covered my cheek with my hand when I stared at myself in the mirror once I got home, asking myself what it meant that I could still feel his lips pressed there.