Once Upon a Grump Read Online Penelope Bloom

Categories Genre: Alpha Male, Billionaire, Contemporary, Funny, Romance Tags Authors:
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Total pages in book: 98
Estimated words: 91480 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 457(@200wpm)___ 366(@250wpm)___ 305(@300wpm)
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Outside, Termite embarrassed me by hunching over to poop in the middle of the sidewalk right as a nice-looking family headed out to their car with luggage. I winced, smiling and waving my poop bag to assure them I was going to clean up after my mentally deficient pet.

But when Termite finished her business, she dragged me over to the family so she could lick the little girl. I said a silent prayer that she wouldn’t hump anyone.

“Hey,” I said while the little girl was petting Termite. “Do you guys know anything about that skyscraper?”

The father turned to look, shielding his eyes. “Pretty out of place, isn’t it?” He had on cargo shorts and one of those vented-in-the-back fishing button-downs men liked to wear.

“That’s what I thought,” I said. “Do you know why they chose to build it here?”

“No idea, darling. We were just visiting. This rest–”

His wife slapped his shoulder with the back of her hand and gave him a look. “She’s not your darling, David.”

He winced. “Sorry, uh. We should get going.”

I smiled and went to tug Termite but saw she was pooping again right in front of the little girl. The girl pinched her nose and pointed. “Ewww! Poopy!”

I sighed and waited awkwardly as Termite tried to break the world record for longest poop right next to the family’s car. The husband shot me a few sheepish smiles and the wife glared at me while they finished packing their things. Almost as soon as they pulled away, Termite finished her work and trotted toward the Inn.

“Thanks for embarrassing me,” I muttered as we went back into the lobby.

Mr. Ashford was waiting with a steaming cup of coffee. “I didn’t know how you take it, so I made it the way I like.”

I thanked him with a smile and took the cup. “Hey, can I ask you a question?”

“Of course.”

“Do you know anything about Stone Tower?”

The old man’s face fell. He suddenly looked a little less cheery and a lot more irritated. “That eyesore popped up last year. Some sort of zoning loophole or oversight let them build it right there.”

“But why did they want to?”

“From what I hear, it’s because Mr. Stone is a recluse. He wanted to get as far from the city as he could while still running his business. They finished construction a couple months ago and nobody I know of has seen him leave that tower–and I know just about everybody. I heard he has his own gym up there, a spa, a library, and even his personal apartments. There’s a helipad on the roof and I’ve seen a chopper come and go a few times.”

I raised my eyebrows as I sipped the coffee. God, I missed this stuff. I could already feel myself getting a spike of energy. “You think that’s all true? He never leaves?”

Mr. Ashford shrugged. “If he did, somebody would’ve seen him by now.”

“Wow. Sounds like a total weirdo. Well, I’ve got an interview with him today. Maybe I’ll ask him what his deal is once I land the job.”

Now it was Mr. Ashford’s big white eyebrows rising. “I’ve talked to some people who work there. They said only his inner circle actually sees him in person. They interviewed with someone else. Apparently, he’s not much of a people person. You’re sure it’s him you will meet with today?

“Oh,” I said, feeling a little deflated. “Well, I’m trying to get a position as his personal assistant. So one way or another, I imagine I’ll see him if I get the job.”

“Huh. You’ll have a lot of folks around here hoping for a bit of gossip if you do. Ever since he came out here with his business, he’s been the talk of the town. The mystery beast who never leaves his tower and so on.”

I pursed my lips. “Well, wish me luck, then. I’d better make sure I’m looking my best for this interview. I wouldn’t want the corporate beast to think I’m a slob if I do get to see him.”

Mr. Ashford smiled. “Good luck, Miss Thorn. I think you might need it.”

I went back to my room, showered, and threw on my best outfit. As excited as I was for the job, I honestly found myself more than a little excited at the possibility of seeing the PJ clad security guy again. I’d had a raunchy dream last night where he poured caramel all over my body and licked it off while growling and glaring at me. I had no idea what that said about me, but I knew it was way better than the dream where naked clowns tried to drag me into a bowling alley.

I let Termite out one more time before I left for my interview. I’d never been much for rehearsing or practicing for things like this. I liked to think I was at my best when I was winging it. If I tried to practice, I’d end up just stumbling over my words and making a fool of myself. Instead, I planned to just rock on in there like I owned the place, give my best smile, and hope for the best. After all, this wasn’t the only job in the country.


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