Total pages in book: 62
Estimated words: 60482 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 302(@200wpm)___ 242(@250wpm)___ 202(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 60482 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 302(@200wpm)___ 242(@250wpm)___ 202(@300wpm)
“What if he doesn’t accept it though? I don’t think I can handle that,” I say, staring at my own hands, and thinking I need to do something with my nails.
“I think you might be surprised. He has survived a lot, Violet, and so have you. Just be honest with him.”
“Thanks, Mom.”
“Anytime you need me, baby. I’m always here.”
I hang up and set the phone down. Then, I text Travis.
V - I think I want to talk about what happened with Lillian. Tonight?
T - Of course. See you when I get home x
I put the phone down and exhale slowly, the ghosts of the past lingering before me.
It’s time to banish them.
TRAVIS SITS IN FRONT of me, his eyes careful and guarded as he rakes them over my face. I am fumbling my hands around, clenching and unclenching them, as I try to prepare myself to tell him a story that I haven’t spoken about since it happened. It’s like a nightmare I keep reliving, and yet as time goes on, it feels like it drifts into the clouds, only coming out when it rains. I need to get this off my chest, and I know now is the time to do it.
“You talk when you’re ready to talk,” he says carefully. “I won’t say a word.”
“Okay,” I whisper. “Lillian and I loved the lake, I’m sure you remember. We spent every waking moment there. We were out there in the afternoon that day, and there was a storm rumbling about, but I honestly didn’t think it was that close. She didn’t want to go in. I kept pushing, telling her to stop being a baby, the storm wasn’t even close. I was wrong, Travis. So fucking wrong. She dove straight into the water to prove me wrong, coming up and laughing, telling me see, she wasn’t a damn baby and I better get in before she started taunting me, too.”
I close my eyes, taking a deep shaky breath for the part that comes next.
“It was as if it came out of nowhere, this crack of lightning so loud it was almost deafening. It hit the water, sending a current across it. It took me a moment to realize it had hit the water, it was only when I looked for her, and I couldn’t find her. I started to scream, running up and down the dock, calling her name, but she wasn’t anywhere. I called for help, and before I knew it, there were police and paramedics. They pulled her body from the water. She had suffered cardiac arrest when the lightning hit the water and drowned.”
Tears flow down my cheeks, heavy and unwavering. My entire body shudders as a pained sound rips from my throat. Travis is there in a second, his arms circling around me as he pulls me to him, soft whispers of soothing comfort. “It wasn’t your fault, baby.”
“It was,” I cry. “I teased her, repeatedly until she got in. If I hadn’t done that, she would still be here. She didn’t want to go in, Travis. Don’t you get it? She didn’t fucking want to go in.”
The last word comes out as a shriek, and Travis holds me tighter. “Baby, no amount of teasing can make someone do something they don’t want to do. Lillian was strong, and she wasn’t easily pushed around. You made a mistake, and you’re living with that mistake, but it wasn’t your fault.”
“Nothing you can ever say will make me believe that,” I whisper. “I will never forgive myself for what happened to her, and now her brother...”
My voice trails off.
“What about her brother?”
Travis releases me, pushing me back so he can see my face. He reaches up, swiping away tears with his thumb as he studies me, his expression a little firmer now.
I open my mouth, then close it and shake my head.
“Violet, talk to me. What about her brother?”
I close my eyes. “He blames me for what happened to Lillian. He came into my work a few weeks ago. I guess he waited until he had enough money to fight it because I haven’t heard from him until now. He told me he is going to charge me with manslaughter and put me away.”
Travis’s face is pale beneath the flush of rage. “When the fuck did you plan to mention that?” His words are flat, clipped, ice slicing the air.
“I didn’t want...I don’t...God, I don’t know. I was scared. But, I have a lawyer. A good one. She’s a partner where I work, she’s helping quietly. I’m not helpless.”
He leans in, so close I can smell his cologne. “You’re not helpless, but you’re not alone, either. You might have a good lawyer, but I have better ones. I’ll pay for the best. I’ll make sure that motherfucker never tries you on again. Do you understand?”