Total pages in book: 54
Estimated words: 51484 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 257(@200wpm)___ 206(@250wpm)___ 172(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 51484 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 257(@200wpm)___ 206(@250wpm)___ 172(@300wpm)
Sutton is completely silent for a long moment before her shoulders shake and a little whimper escapes her lips. I immediately swing her up into my arms, taking the stairs two at a time as heaving sobs wrack her body.
We curl up on the bed as she cries like her fucking heart is breaking all over again. I can’t stop it. All I can do is hold her through it, and promise her that I’m right here. And I am…right fucking here.
I don’t know how long she cries before her tears run dry. She’s so quiet that I think she’s sleeping.
“I thought about going to see him this morning,” she whispers, alerting me to the fact that she’s still wide awake and thinking.
“Is that why you weren’t in bed?”
“I was in the backyard. I couldn’t sleep.”
I roll toward her, tracing the trail of tears on her cheek. They’re dry now, just the remnants left behind. “I was worried you walked out on me,” I admit, my voice a rasp. “You scared me.”
“Walked out on you?” She blinks up at me, clearly shocked. “Why would I do that?”
“Because he’s your brother. Because I should have told you all this shit a long time ago.” I hesitate. “Because maybe I feel guilty and responsible, too.” I mean, Jesus Christ. He convinced himself I was in love with his girl because I was always following Sutton around…and she was always with Sutton. It’s hard not to feel guilty and responsible.
“I get why you didn’t tell me,” Sutton whispers sadly. “Part of me wishes I didn’t know.”
“You regret it?”
“No.” She quickly shakes her head. “I just wish… I guess I wish I didn’t have to know, you know? I wish he hadn’t done it. I wish I could believe him when he says he regrets it. I wish we could undo the last five years.”
“He regrets it,” I murmur.
“How can you be so sure?”
“I saw it on his face when he was talking about Vanessa. He ruined what they had for nothing. He fucking hates himself for that.” I know that look because I’ve seen the same damn look on my face for five years. I hated myself for letting Sutton believe the lie. I hated that I wasn’t good enough for her, and we never got a chance. I lost her before she was ever mine, and that shit haunted me. I think Vanessa haunts Jamison the same way.
I don’t feel sorry for him, though. He deserves to be haunted. He should suffer. And if he’s smart, he’ll use it to grow and change, to be someone worthy of the sister he raised and the girl he broke. Vanessa won’t ever take him back, but he still owes it to her to become someone better. He owes it to Sutton, too.
“Do you think he’ll really get help?”
I hesitate, not sure how to answer that. Can he do it? Yeah. Do I think he will? I don’t know. He’s spent the last five years running from the truth, hiding it, throwing others in front of him as shields. Is he really capable of changing, or is he already too far gone? I don’t know.
“I hope so,” I murmur instead of giving her false hope. But, for her sake, I hope he does. After everything, she deserves that much from him. Hell, she deserves everything.
I dip my head, brushing my lips across hers. “Get some rest, princess. We’ve talked about him in this bed long enough.”
Chapter Twelve
Sutton
The next three days are rough. Jordan tries his best to keep me distracted and happy, but I’m miserable, and it shows. I just can’t get over what Jamison did. And it’s not even just that he took videos of Vanessa and showed them to his teammates. That’s horrible enough. But the fact that he did it for such a stupid, selfish reason is hard to wrap my mind around.
He wanted to punish her. He wanted to hurt her. How am I supposed to reconcile that with the guy who rushed in after our parents died and took custody of me? The one who raised me to do the right thing and be the best version of myself? I just can’t.
“Hey.” Jordan walks up behind me on the third day while I’m standing in front of the bathroom mirror, wrapping his arms around me from behind. “You okay?”
“Yeah. Just thinking.” I force a smile, meeting his worried gaze in the bathroom mirror. “I should be ready to go in a few minutes. I just need to finish dressing.”
He has to be at the arena soon. They have a game tonight. I’m going to hang out with Emilia, Peyton, and Wren while they get ready. I think Micah’s wife, Elodie, will be there, too.
“I have something for you,” he says.
I turn around in his arms, lifting my gaze to his. “What?”