Total pages in book: 100
Estimated words: 93948 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 470(@200wpm)___ 376(@250wpm)___ 313(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 93948 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 470(@200wpm)___ 376(@250wpm)___ 313(@300wpm)
Nox shivers in my arms. “Report! Someone give me a fucking report!”
Poet sprints up. She’s smarter than the rest of us, because she’s done away with her shirt entirely, wearing only a breast band and pants. The rain clings to her light brown skin and plasters her pants to her muscled thighs. “We’ll know soon enough if they’re following the glamour. We just have to put some more distance between us to ensure they take the bait.”
“Put me back in the amplification circle.”
“Absolutely fucking not,” I snap. “Even if the circle still existed—which it doesn’t—there’s no way I’m letting you pull a stunt like that. You’re already half dead—go back in and you’ll be full dead.”
Nox struggles, and it’s a testament to their weakness that they have no chance of breaking free. I don’t even have to tighten my hold. “Better me than the entire crew and ship. Put me back in.”
“Negative, Captain.” Poet motions frantically, and two crew members that I recognize but don’t know the names of rush forward. “Siobhan is right. The amplification circle is gone, but we can take what you’ve done and continue it.”
“It’s too much. They’ll harm themselves from trying.”
Poet and I exchange a look of perfect understanding. There’s absolutely no chance I am letting Nox back in that circle, even if the circle still existed. The fact that it doesn’t should be comforting, but this is Nox we’re talking about. They are so incredibly stubborn that they might go so far as to demand Evelyn create another one. I’m not going to give them a chance.
Poet turns and rushes toward the upper deck, the pair of crew members with her. Within a few minutes, the fog thickens around us again, so deep that I can’t see anything more than a foot away from the edge of the ship. It strikes me that we might be ruining Bastian’s chances to continue his glamour, but when I look up, I realize that the fog doesn’t quite reach the top of the crow’s nest.
I don’t know what to do. As the leader of the rebellion, I’ve always had an answer. It’s worrisome that the moment we have a proper confrontation and a true threat, I fall apart. But Nox doesn’t. Bastian doesn’t. Even the damn crew keeps it together better than I can. I’ve never felt more like an impostor than I do in this moment, standing in the midst of frenzied action while everyone else does what’s necessary to keep us alive.
“Oh, get that look off your face. You can be a hero next time.” Nox pats my cheek gently, and then their hand lingers there. “And don’t think for a second I missed that horrific lie about Bastian still loving me.”
I glance down at them, fully aware they’re creating a distraction. I’m grateful for it, though. “I only speak the truth.”
“Another lie, Siobhan.” They smile a little, but their gray eyes are somber and serious. “We’re all sure to die before this is over. The only question is whether we survive long enough to bring lasting change…or if we go down as a footnote in Threshold’s history as fools with stars in their eyes, wishing for a better world.”
“We’ve already created change. Bastian was correct. It’s not enough. We need to take more direct steps, but it doesn’t change the fact we’ve done so much good over the years. We’ve saved so many lives, communities, and given people a cause to believe in.”
Nox’s eyes flutter closed. This time they don’t open again. They go limp in my arms, only their steady breathing reassuring me that they will be okay. The fact that they had the presence of mind to distract me even while fighting for consciousness humbles me on a level I’m not prepared to deal with.
Maybe I truly am an impostor, powerful only through an accident of birth. Yes, my family trained me in everything from leadership to commerce to community. Yes, I’ve done good work, but there are so many better leaders among the rebellion. Bastian and Nox primary among them.
Why the fuck do they even need me?
Chapter 18
Bastian
I don’t have cause to stretch myself magically all that often. Small glamours are easy enough to pull off, but anything large runs the risk of exposure. My parents trained me to control my magic to prevent it from accidentally slipping free, but even since joining the rebellion, there hasn’t been much opportunity to see what I’m truly capable of.
The risk was too high with the possibility of endangering Siobhan and the rest of the rebellion. A valid fear, because all it took was one mental shield that prevented me from using my magic and it all ended.
I’m pathetically grateful Siobhan wasn’t swept up alongside me when I was taken captive. She would consider it the preferable option, certain that she would be able to fight her way free, but it’s more likely that they would have taken us both, and gods forbid the Cŵn Annwn realize exactly what a treasure they held in their hand. I may be noble by birth, but I’m not delusional about my role within the rebellion. I play support. End of story.