Regretting You Read online J.L. Beck, Cassandra Hallman (Blackthorn Elite #4)

Categories Genre: Angst, Dark, Erotic, New Adult, Romance Tags Authors: , Series: Blackthorn Elite Series by J.L. Beck
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Total pages in book: 70
Estimated words: 65552 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 328(@200wpm)___ 262(@250wpm)___ 219(@300wpm)
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“P-p-please, Jackson.” Her pink lips quiver, and she lifts her hands as if she could fight me off. What does she think is going to happen here?

“I think it’s time you drop the act. If you’re trying to prove you’ve changed, that you aren’t anything like the girl you used to be, you’re doing a shit job at showing it. I can see right through it, and since you think this is a game, I’ll show you how much it isn’t by proving how much I’ve changed. How much I truly don’t give a fuck about you.”

Crowding her, I place both hands on her trembling shoulders and press down. Her body crumbles to the floor, and her knees land harshly against the concrete floor.

“No...no… I won’t. I can’t.” She’s shaking her head, and I ignore the real fear in her voice now. I shut down my emotions, my feelings, my need to protect her, over my need to ruin her. It’s strange to feel two opposing emotions at the same time. Tugging my zipper down, I shove my jeans to my ankles and then my boxers, letting my hard, swollen cock spring free.

My emotions might be haywire when it comes to Kennedy, but my cock isn’t. My cock wants her body wrapped around it, her cunt full of my semen.

Kennedy scurries back at the sight, and the first cry of fear escapes her lips. It’s real and sounds more like a wounded animal.

“Come on, be a good fucking girl and suck me off. We both know you always wanted me to fuck you. You’ve wanted this since you were old enough to realize what it was, so let’s do this.” I take another step forward, and she lets out another cry, but this time, she rolls onto her side and pulls her body into a tight ball. Horrendous sobs fill the room, and I’m taken back by them. My entire body clamps up, and my cock deflates.

“Stop it! Stop this fucking show and get up,” I yell at her, but she doesn’t respond at all. For a few moments, I just stand there watching her fall apart at my feet.

What the fuck is wrong with her?

This isn’t just fear. This is something else. Something that I’m not sure I can comprehend right now. Fear, I can handle, begging me not to do something, I can handle, but a complete and utter breakdown, turning in on yourself. I can’t fucking do it.

Anger surges through my veins, and I’m confused about what I should do. Tugging my boxers back up and my pants, I button myself up before slamming my fist into the side of the bookcase. Fucking fuck. I can’t break something that’s already broken.

“You’ve been spared this time, but next time, I’m taking whatever the fuck I want from you. Tears or not, you’ll feel the pain I feel eventually.”

She sobs harder, and because the sound touches something inside of me, I walk away. The alternative is going to her and wrapping my arms around her, telling her that everything is going to be okay, but it isn’t.

It hasn’t been for a while, and it never will be.

Kennedy became the enemy the night she killed my sister.

6

Kennedy

It took me two days to return to a normal routine. I spent almost an hour in the library, trying to get myself to stop crying and calm down after the incident with Jackson. Then I dragged myself out of the building and went straight home, where I showered, scrubbing my body of the filth I felt before crawling into bed. Jackson couldn’t have known what he’d done. That he recreated my worst nightmare.

I never told him, or anyone, for that matter. I never got the chance. After Jillian’s death, my life became a blur of darkness. My own fears and the things that happened to me, no longer mattered.

It took months for me to stop wishing it was me who had died that day, and even now, I still think about how it never should’ve been her. Today is only the second day I’ve left the apartment since what happened in the library. I haven’t seen Jackson, and my emotions feel as if they’re balancing on a tightrope with shark-infested waters a few feet below.

Looking over my shoulder like a paranoid freak, I rush into one of the local coffee shops on campus, one because coffee is my weakness, and two because I needed to get off the street for a second before I had a mental breakdown.

I know it’s only a matter of time before Jackson pounces on me again. Yes, I had a breakdown in front of him, and he saw me shatter, but I doubt that’s going to hinder him from attacking again. I think my behavior surprised him more than anything, next time, he’ll be prepared.


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