Total pages in book: 78
Estimated words: 75592 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 378(@200wpm)___ 302(@250wpm)___ 252(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 75592 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 378(@200wpm)___ 302(@250wpm)___ 252(@300wpm)
“I’m good. Thanks,” I added, trying to ignore his concerned look.
With that, he climbed out.
“What time do you want me to pick you up?” I asked.
“I’ll have someone drop me,” he said, grabbing his camera.
“Okay. I’ll see you back at the apartment.”
I tried not to speed away.
Then I drove into town, heading to the gas station, parking, and pressing my forehead into the steering wheel.
“Ugh. Get it together.”
It was strange to feel so out of control of my feelings. If anything, I was a pro at masking, hiding anything real. I’d grown up my whole life in an environment where any soft feelings would be used against me.
I don’t know what was wrong with me. I felt oddly unguarded and vulnerable.
Maybe it was just the fallout of leaving, of no longer needing those walls and defenses.
The thing was, I possibly needed them more than ever. The longer I lived with Rook, the more our arrangement would become a friendship. And it was going to take a lot of determination to be able to keep my past from him.
I needed to get a grip.
With that in mind, I climbed out of the car, going into the gas station and grabbing myself a coffee.
Then I went into the car and did the thing that any newly engaged woman would do.
I took little ring selfies while holding my coffee cup.
Maybe if I really committed to the bit, I would stop confusing my feelings.
Finished with pictures—and sending one to Rook along with a little note about not being able to wait to marry him—I took a couple of jobs. I picked up the magazines like I said I would. And while I waited for more jobs to come in, I flagged pages with sticky notes; I circled dresses, bouquets, and veils.
Then, as it got close to the grocery store closing, I made my way back to the apartment with all my magazines.
Rook had already been home, as all his bedding was on the couch. But Rook himself wasn’t around.
Weird.
But it gave me a chance to move his bedding back to the bedroom and put mine on the couch instead.
Finished with that, I went into the bathroom to wash the day—and the confusing feelings associated with it—away.
By the time I made it back out, Rook had returned and traded the bedding once again.
“You’re stubborn.”
“I bought a new couch. But I will be the one enduring the couch until then. Here, what do you think about these ones?” he asked, shuffling papers around.
That was where he’d been. Down at the karate studio printing out images.
I took the photos, not anticipating how real they would look, how much we seemed like a couple genuinely in love.
I mean, yes, from an artistic standpoint, they were beautiful. The colored rocks were a stunning backdrop for the proposal.
But the crazy thing was… you weren’t even drawn to the mountains. All you could look at was us.
My shock registered as real. And maybe, knowing what I did, that was because I’d been so surprised at how gorgeous the ring was, how much it suited me.
As for Rook, he managed to look up at me with what I could only describe as awe. I guess between the two of us, Rook was the superior actor.
There was a snap of him slipping the ring on my finger, another of me admiring the ring.
Then, of course, the kiss.
Feeling it had been one thing. Seeing it was a whole other. The desire reignited through my overwrought system.
I shuffled to the next image before the memories could rush back any more.
Then, somehow, the image of us embracing was even more impactful. It was surprisingly intimate, even more so than the kiss itself.
Finally, the last image caught that second when he pressed a kiss to the top of my head while we held each other.
“Good, right?” Rook asked.
“What? Oh, yeah. I, uh, I think Nancy will be convinced.” I rushed to hand the pictures back, not wanting to obsess over them.
“Which one should we put in a frame?” he asked. “The moment of proposal?”
“Yeah, that’s the one,” I said. The last picture would be the most convincing. But I also didn’t want to have to walk past it every day.
“I saw all the magazines. You’re really dedicated to the bit.”
“That’s me. A team player,” I said.
“Tessa,” Rook called as I started to make my way toward the bedroom.
“Yeah?” I asked, turning back but focusing my gaze on his chin rather than his eyes.
“Are we good?”
“Yeah, of course.” Then, knowing I wasn’t being very convincing, I added, “I’m just tired tonight.”
“Okay,” he said, watching me, likely seeing a little too much.
But I turned away and walked back to the bedroom.
I sat down on the edge of the bed, pinching my contacts out of my eyes and storing them in my spare case on the nightstand, since I was constantly guilty of forgetting to take them out in the bathroom.