Total pages in book: 168
Estimated words: 159420 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 797(@200wpm)___ 638(@250wpm)___ 531(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 159420 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 797(@200wpm)___ 638(@250wpm)___ 531(@300wpm)
Not to mention, every time I thought about taking an interest in my courses, finding joy in books, movies, music, or literally anything else, I kept thinking it was of no use. Who cared if I had a hobby or if I liked something enough to turn it into my passion when I knew my future was set. I knew where I was going to end up, married to a man like my father and trying to survive like my mother. And then probably end up like her too. Again, it took me nineteen years to figure out that my dad stole from me more than I’d realized. More than I could ever get back.
Another thing that came to me: I love him. I love Radisson King. My Phantom, my hunter, the man who stole me not once but twice and whose life my father destroyed in more ways than one.
This wasn’t a realization, though. It was more of a knowledge, lying bone-deep, something ancient and instinctual. I could say I fell in love with him when he threw himself in front of the bullet for me. Or when I realized he watches me so closely that not only does he know my coffee order but exactly how I order it and how much I tip. I could say I fell in love with him up on that cliff where he admitted to feeding those three men to the coyotes because they’d scared me. And that he beats up those men my father forces me to go out with, all because I’m disgusted by them. Or maybe I fell in love with him when he told me he’d kill my father for everything he’s done to my mom and me.
But it would all be a lie. Because I know the moment it happened. It was when he came to my rescue the very first time. When he beat those men up, the ones he later killed, and I stared into his stunning green eyes. Before that moment, I thought I was alone. I felt so very alone, but he made me realize he was there for me. He was watching. And maybe, just maybe, he’d keep me safe. And he has. All this time, in so many, many ways. In ways that only he can and not anyone else. Like he keeps telling me.
Much like he told me I’d be safe tonight through the summer storm they’ve been predicting as long as I stay indoors. They say it’s going to be a bad one. It’s going to be short but intense, mostly overnight. Heavy downpours and even heavier winds. All day today black clouds have gathered in the sky, making it seem swollen. The heavy and humid air clings to everything, the trees, the grass, the windows, to the very pores of our bodies. Everything seems close to bursting, restless and impatient.
Even now as I sit in my bed, hugging my knees, through the window I can see the wind blowing, whipping, lashing, bending trees this way and that, howling with power. It’ll happen any second now. Any second the sky will open up and start pouring rain down on the earth. I’m not afraid of it, though. I don’t need protection from it, no matter how vicious it may seem. In fact, I want to revel in it. I want to seize the moment. I’ve already lost too many of them. I’ve already lost too much time.
At my thought, the lightning flashes through the sky, quick but so bright that the night turns into day for half a second, and I spring up from the bed. I don’t wait for the crack of thunder to follow, I simply run out of the room and head to the front door. I throw it open just as the thunder booms through the sky, but the sound of the door hitting the wall is louder. Another flash of lightning and I see him. He’s in the stables just across from the house and tending to Tulip.
Or he was. Until I showed up on the porch, my chest heaving, my eyes focused on him.
He’s too far away from me to notice these things, but I still think he frowns under his Stetson. I still think his chest shudders with a breath because even though he shouldn’t be able to see me that clearly either, he can still read my intentions. He can still figure out what I want.
And what I want is him. What I want is my father to not take this away from me too. Not this, not the man I love.
I don’t know what the future holds. I don’t know where I’ll go from here. I know I’ll be safe from every threat out there because he’ll make it so. I know he’ll bring his little sister back home because he’ll make that happen too. But other than that, I don’t know what will happen to me or us. It doesn’t seem like there ever can be an us, not with who I am and who he is.