Total pages in book: 120
Estimated words: 117740 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 589(@200wpm)___ 471(@250wpm)___ 392(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 117740 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 589(@200wpm)___ 471(@250wpm)___ 392(@300wpm)
“Oh, right, carry on.” Isadora tilted her head in my direction. “Good morning.”
“Is it?” I replied dryly. “I don’t even know what I’m doing here.”
She laughed, crossing her arms over her chest. “Yeah, been there. This does work though. Watch.”
Rose spat on the suction end of the dildo and spread it out, firmly grasping its shaft with her other hand. I shifted uncomfortably at the sight—I knew exactly what her hand felt like in that situation, and all the thoughts I had were going straight down to my cock, sending very unfortunate messages.
Isadora quietly laughed next to me, as if she knew what I was thinking.
Hell, she probably did.
I wasn’t so stupid as to think Rose hadn’t told her how we knew one another.
Rose attached the suction to the dent on Susan’s car, holding it in place. Now both hands were wrapped around the penis part, and I briefly turned away. How the fuck I hadn’t reached down to adjust my trousers I didn’t know, but I did have to shift my position to hide my cock’s betrayal of me.
I was in my thirties, and here I was, getting hard in public like an uncontrolled teenager.
“Bet you wish you’d left, huh,” Isadora whispered as Rose wiggled the dildo to see if it was well stuck on.
Yeah.
She knew.
I quietly cleared my throat, refusing to answer.
How had this become my life?
Rose braced herself with one foot on the car. “Ready? One, two, three,” she said, then tugged. It took a couple of attempts, but there was a ‘pop’ as the metal went back into place, and Rose carefully removed the dildo from it before giving the boot door a close look.
“Goodness,” Susan said, touching her hand to her chest. “I really do need to get one of those to keep in the car.”
My eyes widened.
“Well, I’m not explaining to Shaun why all the over-sixties suddenly have a dildo in their glovebox,” Isadora said brightly. “Car looks smashing, Susan.”
The older woman beamed at her. “Rose is a genius.”
Rose was something all right.
‘Resourceful’ was probably a better word than ‘genius,’ though.
Rose straightened up with a grin, still happily holding the dildo. “Bertha did a great job.”
“Bertha?” I asked, raising my eyebrows.
Isadora buried her face in her hands. “No.”
“Yep. ’Cause Bertha’s got girth.” Rose grinned, wiggling the pink dildo at me.
I stared at her for a moment, dumbfounded, then shook my head. “I’m done here.”
“No! Wait!” She chased after me, still holding the bloody sex toy. “What about the shed?”
I stopped, sighing. “I don’t have time today. I’ll handle it, all right?”
She shuffled around to stand in front of me and gazed up at me with narrowed eyes. “You better.”
“I promise.” I touched a fingertip to the top of the dildo and pushed it away from me. “You know,” I whispered, leaning in. “If you’ve got anything else like that in your shed, you should bring it out next time you’re on your knees, princess.”
Her cheeks turned red, and I sidestepped her attempt at hitting me with the rubber penis before running away.
“You—!”
I winked at her over my shoulder. “Talk to you later.”
“Bastard!” she shouted, and I felt a hefty whack on my left shoulder.
“What the…” I turned to see Rose standing with her hands up, and when I looked down, my eyes found the bright pink dildo on the ground.
Did she just throw her fucking dildo at me?
I bent down and picked it up. “Rose.”
She swallowed, taking a step back. “Um, yes?”
I held it up. “I’m confiscating this.”
“You’re doing what? No, wait!” She rushed after me, and I raised it up over my head where I knew she couldn’t reach it. “Give me back Bertha!”
“If you wanted to keep her, you should have thought about it before you threw her at me.” I looked down at her and pressed my hand to her forehead, keeping her flailing arms at bay. “She’s mine, now.”
“Nooo,” she whined, letting her arms fall down as she leant into my hand. “Bertha has the best suction for dents. She lives in my toolbox. Give her back.”
This was so fucking ridiculous, so why was I smiling like a clown?
“Fine,” I said quietly, leaning in towards her slightly. “Come and see me later, and I’ll give it to you.”
She peered up at me, pouting. “You mean that?”
I smirked. “Since when did I say things I didn’t mean?”
24
* * *
ROSE
Sneaky Bastard
Ilooked up as Oliver walked in from the bathroom, securing a towel around his waist. I glared at him, and he raised one eyebrow in question.
“What’s that look for?” he asked, running his hand through his hair. “Three orgasms not enough for you, princess?”
I wanted to wring his neck every time he called me that.
I was hoping that he’d give up if I stopped whinging about it, so I was letting it pass for now.