Total pages in book: 57
Estimated words: 54059 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 270(@200wpm)___ 216(@250wpm)___ 180(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 54059 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 270(@200wpm)___ 216(@250wpm)___ 180(@300wpm)
“For me, it’s your eyes.” She touches the corner of her eye. Even in the dark with only the street lights, I can see how they sparkle. She’s so pretty. My mom has this little ceramic angel that she puts out during Christmas. The figurine has dark brown hair wrapped in a bun and rosy cheeks that match the red dress. The red dress has painted white fur at the bottom and the collar. As a little boy, I’d stare at that little Christmas decoration for hours, but I never touched it. Even as a boy, I had big hands, and I knew that if I got too close, I’d probably break the thing. Andy reminds me of that ceramic doll. She’s so pretty, so breakable.
“What’s wrong with my eyes?”
“There’s nothing wrong, but I…” She pauses and glances at me from the side of her eyes. “I see myself in them, I guess. Kind of wary about the world because we know that there’s not a lot of good out there, and we have to protect ourselves and the people we love. My mom, she’s not going to win any parenting awards, and she gets in trouble a lot, but she’s still my mom, you know? I want her to be okay, which is probably dumb of me, but I can’t help it.”
“I get it.” She sees herself in me? I don’t know whether that’s good or bad, but like the ceramic Christmas doll, I can’t let anything happen to Andy. I’m afraid of getting too close, but I also can’t stay away.
Chapter Twelve
ANDY
“It’s pretty up here,” I say, sitting down on the bench. Niki keeps his hold on my hand, sitting down next to me. We’re at an old grotto at the top of a hill overlooking the river. I didn’t know this place was here. It’s beautiful.
“I come here when I need to get away.”
I nod in understanding. Sometimes I need to do the same, but I’ve never really found a place. Usually I’ll just allow myself to get lost in a book. “It’s quiet.” The city noise is gone.
“Yeah.”
I close my eyes, smiling. All you can hear is the wind and the soft splash of the water. I can see why he likes it here. It's not only quiet, but it's calming. It's a reminder that there is a bigger world out there. You can get lost in the city with the daily grind of life. The hustle and bustle can swallow you up if you let it. When you’re trying to survive, it’s hard not to fall victim to it.
"Makes me think of possibilities."
"What kind?" Niki asks. I open my eyes to see he's watching me.
"Just a different kind of life, you know?"
"I do. I want that for my sister." I smile at that.
There is this whole other side to Niki I don’t think many get to see, and he’s showing it to me. It makes me feel special, and that’s not a normal experience for me.
“I don’t think my mom wants that.” I’d love to get her out of here or on another path, but she doesn’t put any effort into it. “It scares me.” I don’t think I’ve ever admitted that out loud to anyone before. There’s something about Niki that has me doing and saying things I normally wouldn’t.
“It should.”
I love that he doesn’t try to sugarcoat things for me. While it’s nice at the moment, it doesn’t help in the long run. People being honest with me are few and far between, so Niki doing it is refreshing.
“Why do you say that?” I ask.
“When people close to you are drowning, they tend to pull you under with them.” As if on cue, I hear the waves hit the rocks below.
“I can’t even swim, so—” I let out a humorless laugh.
“You can’t swim?” A surprised expression takes over his handsome face.
“Nope.” My mom wasn’t taking me to swimming lessons. The most I got was a local park if I was lucky when I was younger.
“Everyone should know how to swim.”
“You could teach me.” I bump him with my shoulder, only teasing.
“I definitely can.”
“I was joking.” I don’t want him to feel obligated or anything.
“You should know how to swim.”
“I think you just want to see me in a bathing suit.”
“Wouldn’t mind it.” He shrugs. There is something about his lackadaisical shrugs that I find oddly endearing.
"But I think you're right. The water is getting rougher, and I am starting to feel like she's pulling me under with her." It's one small thing and then another when it comes to my mom. She knows it’s hard for me to say no to her and uses that against me.
I mean she asked me to go and buy drugs for her, and I did it. I crossed a line I had vowed never to. Soon that will feel normal, and I'd be crossing another line in the sand I tried to draw.