Total pages in book: 35
Estimated words: 32319 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 162(@200wpm)___ 129(@250wpm)___ 108(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 32319 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 162(@200wpm)___ 129(@250wpm)___ 108(@300wpm)
I don't give a fuck. Let them believe what they want.
Sometimes a reputation keeps you safer than a gun.
"Dad's building a Camaro," one of the boys tells Savannah. "’69. It's in the outbuilding by the stables."
"Restoration project," Havoc explains, almost looking embarrassed. "Something to keep my hands busy when I'm home."
"He won't let anyone touch it," June says with a smile. "Not even me."
"Some things a man needs to do himself," Havoc says, and I nod because I understand.
Some work is prayer.
Some work is penance.
Sometimes they're the same thing.
Dinner winds down as the light fades. We eat dessert bathed in the same comfortable conversation. And when that’s over June stands. "Alright, time for bed," she announces. This is met with a chorus of groans. "No arguments."
"Can we show Savannah the horses first?" the oldest girl asks.
"Another time," June says firmly. "Now scoot."
I watch them file inside, these children with their outlaw father and their normal lives. They each stop to kiss Havoc goodnight, even the oldest boy who's trying so hard to be a man. June follows them in, promising to return once they're settled.
Havoc pulls out two beers and a bottle of whiskey, settin’ them on the table between us. Savannah takes a beer. I shake my head at both, pulling out my cigarettes instead.
"Mind?" I ask, tapping the pack.
"Just stay downwind of the house," Havoc says. "June'll have my ass if the kids smell it."
I light up, taking that first deep drag that feels like salvation. The nicotine hits my bloodstream as I exhale toward the darkening sky. Stars are coming out now, one by one, pinpricks in the black canvas above us.
"How'd you and June meet?" Savannah asks, taking a sip of her beer.
Havoc leans back in his chair, a smile softening his usually hard face. "Army. We were both stationed in Germany. She outranked me."
"Still does," I mutter, and Havoc laughs.
"Damn straight." He pours himself a finger of whiskey. "Third date, she described this life to me. This exact one we're living. The land, the house, the kids, all of it. Asked if it was my idea of paradise."
"And you said yes," Savannah fills in.
Havoc nods. "I said it was. She said, 'Let's make it happen.'"
I take another drag, once again studyin' the stars. In my head, I'm wondering how this squares with the Badlands patch on his cut, with the gun room, with the blood I know he's spilled.
This little slice of heaven doesn't come cheap, and it doesn't come clean.
June returns, sliding into the chair beside Havoc. She must read the question on my face because she answers before I can ask it.
"This world doesn't owe you shit," she says, her voice suddenly harder than it's been all night. "If you want something, you have to take it. If you have a dream, you have to make it."
"And in order to make it, you need family. That's what the club is," Havoc says, looking directly at Savannah now. "Family."
I grunt in agreement, liftin’ my cigarette in a mock toast. "To fuckin' family."
Family is Mercy waiting for me at the clubhouse.
Family is Destiny driving away with an Ashby baby in her arms.
Family is the men who voted to keep Savannah safe, and the eight who didn't.
Family is the weight that keeps you breathin’ when you want to stop.
It's not perfect.
It doesn't have to be perfect.
It just has to be enough.
CHAPTER 10
Saying goodbye to June and Havoc feels like more of a somber affair than it should when it comes time to leave. It was a nice night. Their farm is quaint and lovely. Their children full of life and spark.
I want those things.
I want the small, lived-in house filled with things that have been collected over the years and come with experiences. I want the kids too. Maybe not six, but I can definitely see myself with a pack of them.
But it's June and Havoc's relationship that I find the most desirable.
Also, the most out of reach.
Twenty-three years they've been together. Twenty-three years they've pledged allegiance to each other. Stuck it out through the births, and deaths, and all unseen things that come with life.
And that's not even counting all the things that come with outlaw biker life.
I will kill for him. He will kill for me. And both of us will kill for those kids.
The words echo in my head as Legion revs the bike and we pull away from the farmhouse. I watch June's silhouette in the doorway, her hand raised in a simple goodbye. She doesn't wave it back and forth like most people do. Just holds it up, steady, like a promise.
Could I do that? Kill for Legion?
I wrap my arms tighter around his waist as we hit the main road, the wind whipping around my helmet. His body is warm against mine, solid. Real.