Total pages in book: 99
Estimated words: 96170 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 481(@200wpm)___ 385(@250wpm)___ 321(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 96170 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 481(@200wpm)___ 385(@250wpm)___ 321(@300wpm)
“It’s been weird. Everyone in my family knows about what happened. But you always look at me like I’m just another person. I liked it for a little while. Maybe that’s why I haven’t talked about it.”
“You’re still my Fiorella. What happened to you back then doesn’t change anything.”
“Even if it suddenly explains all my crazy?”
“Especially then. I like your crazy.”
“You’re supposed to say something like, what crazy, you’re perfect.”
“Sorry, cara mia, but we’re all a little fucked.”
“Yeah? What’s your story then?”
He lets out a long sigh. I pull back to look into his eyes, but he only shakes his head slightly, like he can’t bring himself to say. I touch his cheek, and suddenly I see a deep hidden pain he’s been hiding from me, a reservoir of hurt. And I realize he’s got a story too. Just like mine, it still pushes him. It shapes him into what he is now.
And I wonder if we can ever outrun our past, or if we’re doomed to keep on reliving the worst days of our lives over and over. It isn’t fair the way we hold onto the terrible while letting go of all the good. But that’s the way people are. The wounds are deep, and they never quite heal. Nice days don’t leave scars.
My phone starts ringing. It buzzes against the mat. I pull it out and frown at the screen. “It’s Raf,” I say, my heart suddenly racing. “He never calls me.”
“Answer.” Luca shifts back to give me some space. “It’s probably important.”
Nerves jangle along my spine, and I know what he’s going to say before I even lift the phone to my ear. I know, and I know because it’s all we’ve been waiting for, but that doesn’t make it easy.
“Hello?” My voice doesn’t shake. That’s good.
“I know it’s early, but I need you to come to the house right away.”
I stare at Luca. His face is calm and firm. I take some courage from that. No matter what happens, I know he’ll be by my side through it all. If I let him, anyway.
“What happened?” I whisper softly.
“Just come to the house right now, Fiorella. Bring your husband. Don’t wait, okay? Get here as soon as you can.”
He hangs up. I stare in numb horror at the black screen.
“What did he say?” Luca asks gently.
“He wants us to go over to the house.”
He nods as if that’s what he expected. “I’m sorry, mia cara. I really am.”
I burst into tears. It’s all too much. Between telling Luca the story and now this, I finally break. He pulls me against him again, hugging me tightly as I sob into his shoulder, and I don’t want to go anywhere. If I get up, the world’s going to change. Maybe if we stay here together, we don’t have to go through all the shit that’s coming.
Life doesn’t work that way. It keeps on coming, whether you want it to or not.
I give myself a minute. I deserve that much at least. When I finally get control of my crying, I push back from Luca and get to my feet. I hold out a hand for him and lean back to help him get up.
“Let’s go do this,” I say, wiping my face. “Can’t hide from reality, right?”
“No, baby, you can’t.” He tugs me into him and kisses me softly. “But you can make a better one if you’re a little bit lucky and you try hard enough.”
Chapter 27
Fiorella
We’re not the first people to show up at my father’s house.
Men are gathered in the living room. Men I’ve known all my life but are rarely ever in the same room. There’s Carmine Serrano, my father’s second cousin, skinny and intense. He’s talking to Nicolo Serrano, his brother, rounder and a little louder, but now more subdued than I’ve ever seen him. Toward the back, drinking coffee alone, is Filippo Benedetti, an important accountant and Capo in charge of keeping track of the Famiglia’s business expenditures, and near him is Rocco Russo, one of my father’s most loyal enforcers.
They’re all old men. They’ve been around the Famiglia forever. And they’re the heart of the organization’s power. Aside from Uncle Corrado, these are the most powerful people in my world, each a made man, a Capo in the organizational structure, and a little chief of their own powerful tribe.
All eyes turn to me. And I know without anyone speaking.
“He’s waiting up there.” Carmine jerks his head toward the steps, his expression grim. His eyes move to Luca, looming behind me. “Maybe it’s better this way, yeah? Less time to linger?”
“Better for whom?” I ask and don’t wait for an answer. Luca stays right behind me as I climb up, my heart racing, feeling sick. I’m terrified I’ll throw up. I don’t want to do this because the second I see Raf, I know it’s over.