Total pages in book: 24
Estimated words: 21230 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 106(@200wpm)___ 85(@250wpm)___ 71(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 21230 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 106(@200wpm)___ 85(@250wpm)___ 71(@300wpm)
Since I was scheduled to arrive in the early morning, I'd insisted my mom and her husband, Lucas, not meet me at the airport. Instead, I took a taxi to their townhouse where they gave me a warm welcome. My mom had married Lucas when I was seven, and a few years later they'd had my younger brother, Victor, who was getting ready to go to university later this year. After greetings and long hugs, they took me into the kitchen where breakfast was waiting.
Conversation was light during our meal, but I noticed the concerned looks my mom was giving me. When the plates were cleared, and Lucas and Victor had gone off to get ready for the day, she asked me what was wrong.
"Nothing." I was looking out the window and watching snow fall.
"Axel," she said, "I may not see you often, but I know you. Is everything okay with your sponsorships and your team?"
"Yeah, that's all fine." I answered with an upbeat tone, hoping she'd be reassured and not question me any further. No such luck.
"And how is your health? Are you feeling okay?"
"I'm fine." I got up to pour myself more coffee.
"Is it a girl?"
I made the mistake of not answering immediately.
"Axel..."
I heard her turn in her chair and I felt her stare.
"Has a girl finally gotten through to you?"
"Gotten through to me?" I said. I turned to see a hopeful expression on her face.
"Is there finally someone you care about?"
She knew me much too well. I just shrugged. "I'm fine, mother."
My family visit went by quickly because we kept busy. I was relieved not to have a lot of time alone with my thoughts. My mom tried twice to talk to me about what was bothering me, but she didn't push.
Before I left she told me that she'd hoped I'd finally found a good woman and that things would work out. She said she thought I'd be happier if I "settled down." She and Lucas had celebrated their twentieth wedding anniversary last year. She still believed in love, and was making it work, even after having been left by my dad.
At the airport, waiting for my return flight, I was checking messages when a young blond woman took the open seat next to me. She started a conversation, and it turned out that she also was Belgian and now living in the U.S. We talked for a while and eventually I realized she was flirting with me. I was surprised to also realize that I was not interested in flirting back. She was very attractive, and normally I would have had her number by now, but I suddenly had no interest. We parted ways when boarding began.
On the flight home, I couldn't sleep. With nothing to distract me, my mind kept replaying my last conversation with Kayla. I kept picturing the look of pity in her eyes when I'd told her I didn't make emotional commitments.
What was it Kayla had said about me? 'That's no way to go through life.' Maybe it was time to consider a change.
CHAPTER 10
WALKING ON CLOUDS
KAYLA
I felt lighter. I actually felt lighter, like I was beginning to be free.
The night of my confrontation with Axel in the bar, I'd felt terrible, and I'd been in a state of shock about the admission I'd made to him. But the next day, I woke up feeling like I'd jumped over a hurdle, and maybe it would be easier from here on out.
I knew with complete certainty that all this time I'd been idolizing a version of Axel that did not exist. He was a good-looking and likable man, yes, but in one major way he wasn't really a man at all. When it came to relationships, he was still a child emotionally, and realizing that about him magically broke the spell he'd had over me.
This new revelation gave me the mental distance I needed to write the article about Axel, and finally it seemed to just flow from my fingers. I did a bit of additional research, reviewed my notes, and met my word count in no time. I felt lighter still.
Maybe dating would be different now. In a way, I'd been as emotionally stunted as Axel when it came to relationships. I hadn't gotten close to anyone either, though it wasn't because of a conscious choice on my part. Maybe I'd be able to find that spark with someone, now that I wouldn't be measuring men against an ideal that didn't exist.
Two weeks passed. Dean reviewed my article and seemed to be pleased with it. I was feeling hopeful about life in general, and then I heard from him. Axel left a message on my work voicemail. I was going through messages in the morning, and suddenly his voice was in my ear.