Total pages in book: 101
Estimated words: 94092 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 470(@200wpm)___ 376(@250wpm)___ 314(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 94092 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 470(@200wpm)___ 376(@250wpm)___ 314(@300wpm)
I freeze. The question hits like a jolt, and Amelia’s eyes snap to mine, surprise flashing through them. She sets her slice down, her fingers brushing the napkin, and leans toward him, her voice astonished. “You guys don’t do stuff like this? As a family?”
Jason shrugs, his gaze dropping to his plate, a shadow crossing his face. “No.” His voice is quiet, almost sad, and it twists something in me, a guilt I didn’t expect.
I swallow, my throat tight, and force a casual tone. “We’re busy, buddy. You know that. Work, school, stuff. We’re on vacation now… so it’s different.” The words feel hollow, a weak excuse, and Amelia’s searching stare pins me like she sees through it.
She tilts her head and looks at me. Her eyes hold mine, a quiet question, and I feel the weight of it, the unspoken, undeniable truth—that our marriage is a shell, a routine that bleeds and infects the child. Without the warmth. Without love. I never realized how withdrawn Jason had become until now. Soon, I will have to face my part in this strange arrangement I have made with Sara and make changes. Big changes that will ultimately benefit Jason. I don’t want Jason to grow up in a loveless household and think that is what a family should be like.
I lean closer, my voice low, just for her. “I lost my way, Amelia. I will find it again. For Jason’s sake.”
Her eyes fill with tears and concern for me.
And my heart fills with warmth at her love for me and Jason. Leaning back, my hand finds hers under the table. I give it a quick squeeze. Her fingers are warm and soft. She squeezes back, her touch like a promise.
The meal ends, and we head to the rink. We rent skates from a counter cluttered with laces and disinfectant spray. Jason’s clumsy, his skates wobbling, but Amelia takes his hand and guides him onto the polished wood. Her movements are so fluid and graceful. I don’t join them straightaway.
Instead, I lean against the railing, watching, my breath catching as she glides, her pink dress flaring slightly, her hair swinging like a golden curtain. She’s a beautiful skater, just like when she was younger. She laughs, helping Jason find his balance, and he giggles, his face happier than I’ve seen him in months. My heart swells, a fierce love for her, for them, and it’s violent, this feeling, a rage at the life I’ve built without her.
I don’t understand it—how can she do this to me?
How can just a few days with her upend everything?
I realize my life’s totally different with her in it, alive in a way it hasn’t been ever since I left her. Jason’s different, too, laughing, open, his shell cracking under her warmth. I don’t remember hearing laughter like this in our house, not from him, in fact, not even with Sara, and it kills me. It’s like a sharp ache that makes me question everything.
Why is he so quiet with us?
Why is our home so still, so empty of this joy?
I watch Amelia spin, her smile radiant, Jason clinging to her hand, and I’m so angry—at her father, at myself, at the world that kept her from me. I love her more every second, and I’m starting to care less and less about the consequences of us being together. This, I acknowledge, is a very dangerous shift. It scares me, but I can’t stop it.
“Max, come on!” Amelia calls, her voice full of laughter, pulling me from my thoughts. She waves, her eyes sparkling under the rink’s flashing lights, and Jason echoes her words, his face split into a wide grin.
I shake my head, a grin tugging at my lips despite the storm inside. “I will, but I’m good just watching for now,” I call back.
“Spoil sport,” she mouths and sails away with my son, and my eyes don’t leave her, tracing every move, every laugh.
She’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, and I’m falling, deeper, harder, with no way back.
Chapter
Twenty-Nine
AMELIA
As we pull into the driveway back at the house, all I can think is how deliriously happy I am. My heart is so full it feels like it might literally explode. I don't know how I can possibly contain this wild, reckless joy pulsing through me.
Memories of the skating rink linger on—Jason’s giggles, his small hand in mine as we glided harmoniously. Max’s eyes were on me, dark and burning, watching every move like I was his whole world. My skin hums, alive with the memory of his gaze, the way he squeezed my hand, a secret promise under the table.
I steal a glance at him now, his profile stern in the dashboard’s glow, his jaw tight, his hands gripping the wheel. He’s fighting the same ugly demons I am, and it makes me ache. But their lure is such a sweet, dangerous pull that I find it impossible to resist.