Total pages in book: 130
Estimated words: 128417 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 642(@200wpm)___ 514(@250wpm)___ 428(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 128417 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 642(@200wpm)___ 514(@250wpm)___ 428(@300wpm)
“Wait,” I command.
She doesn’t wait.
“Wait.”
“Enjoy living in Seattle,” she tosses back to me over her shoulder. “Hope you have fun.”
“Oh my God. The drama,” I say. In five easy strides, I’ve caught up to her. I grab her shoulders and turn her around and kiss her. Without hesitation, she presses herself into me, throws her arms around my neck, and surrenders to me.
I always say, when it comes to women, especially angry ones, there’s very little that can’t be fixed with a fucking awesome kiss.
We stand together, kissing like crazy for several minutes, both of us bursting with desire and emotion and arousal.
“I just don’t understand why you didn’t tell me,” she whispers, abruptly pulling away from me. “I would have been bursting at the seams to tell you if the situation were reversed. You would have been the first person I would have called.”
My heart drops into my toes. When she puts it like that, I suddenly understand why she’s so upset. “Babe,” I say. “I’m just not wired to make promises about the future, that’s all. My brain doesn’t work like a normal person’s.”
“I’m not asking for promises about the future—you think eight weeks from now is ‘the future’?” Kat shakes her head and steps back from our embrace. “I’m not thinking clearly. You kiss me and I lose my mind. That’s always been my problem around you. I’m so physically attracted to you, I can’t think.” She rubs her forehead. “I think we need to take a step back. Slow things down. I think we need to find out if we actually like each other in real life. Obviously, you’re scared shitless this thing between us won’t translate to living in the same city—and maybe you’re right.” She swallows hard. “Maybe we should trust your gut.”
“What?”
“We’ve been living in a weird sort of fantasy from day one,” she continues. “First we were in Las Vegas doing our Ocean’s Eleven thing and now we fly to see each other on weekends so we can role-play imaginary-pornos and get stoned. Everything with us is nonstop excitement—fantasy. We never do normal, real-life stuff like play a board game or go to the freakin’ grocery store.” She shrugs. “Maybe you’re just addicted to excitement, and not to me, specifically. Maybe none of this is real.”
My blood is pulsing in my ears. “Kat, no. Everything I’ve ever said or done when I’m with you is real. Always. Even our fantasies are real—that’s what’s so awesome about us—real life is a fantasy when it comes to you and me.”
“Your move to Seattle is for sure?” she asks softly.
“Yeah. I made a cash offer on a place yesterday. It’s ten minutes away from Jonas’ place.”
Kat’s face contorts. “I just can’t believe you didn’t mention that to me—especially after how many times I’ve said the long distance thing is killing me or I wish we lived in the same city.”
“I’m sorry. I was just... ” I don’t finish my sentence. There’s really no adequate way to explain why I didn’t tell her. I’m suddenly realizing I’m a complete idiot.
She sniffles. “I get it. Sarah told me to listen to your actions and not your words. Well, I guess I just heard you loud and clear. From here on out, I’ll expect nothing from you. We’ll continue to have fun with no expectations and no promise of a future. We can date other people, whatever. We’ll start from scratch. Get to know each other outside all the excitement and fantasy.”
“You wanna date other people?” I blurt, my heart exploding with panic.
“No,” she says quickly. “Not at all. I don’t want anyone but you.” Tears flood her eyes. “That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you.”
“Well, I don’t want anyone but you, either,” I say. I clutch her to me, relief flooding me. If she’d said she wanted anyone but me, I would have lost my shit. “Kat, we both feel exactly the same way.” I kiss her temple. “Please don’t read into me not telling you. It doesn’t mean anything—we feel the same way.”
“I don’t think we do, Josh. I don’t think you realize how much... ” Her words catch in her throat. Tears spill out of her eyes. “If I’d bought a house in L.A.,” she says, “I would have been thrilled to tell you about it. I would have talked your ear off about it.”
“Kat,” I choke out. “You’re breaking my heart. I feel the way you do. I’m just not good at... saying certain things. I’m not good at committing to certain things. But that doesn’t mean I don’t feel. Please, Kat. I just need time, that’s all.”
Kat wipes her eyes again. “I get it. Take as much time as you need. You’re not ready for a commitment of any kind. Good for me to know—better I learned it now than later.” She wipes her eyes and sets her jaw. “Obviously, I can’t take you home to meet my family tomorrow. I’m sure you understand.”