Total pages in book: 97
Estimated words: 93936 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 470(@200wpm)___ 376(@250wpm)___ 313(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 93936 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 470(@200wpm)___ 376(@250wpm)___ 313(@300wpm)
“If we record in Beaumont, maybe I’ll get to know her better. She seems like a pretty chill mom.”
“She is and it’s possible,” I say, shrugging. “I have a feeling she and my dad are going to move back.”
“Leaving you in LA by yourself?” she asks in mock horror.
“Honestly . . . yeah, I guess so.” If my parents move, I’ll probably go back to Beaumont and at least reset.
An uncomfortable silence fills the room. I hate the awkward pause, the unknowing of what you should say. I could ask her why she’s here, but that would be rude. We’ve spent time together writing songs. It makes sense for her to be here.
Sort of.
It’s probably odd for her to be in my green room. There has only been one other time we’ve been cut off from the rest of our bandmates, and that was in my hotel room. Every other time, we’ve been in common areas, working on music together. This is probably one of those moments where I should tell her to leave or stand up and open the door so that nothing nefarious happens between us.
Instead, I glance at her standing there, near the vanity, and ask, “You ready for tonight?”
She nods. “More than ready,” Justine says softly.
There’s a hint of self-assurance in her voice—steadier than before. She’s getting stronger. More confident.
Maybe I should take a page out of her book and grow a set. Part of me wants to tell her everything: from the note to the ring, to why I’ve been so damn moody. How Nola left me and how, until recently, I’ve been desperate to reach her but I’m too afraid to pick up the damn phone to call her. To what I saw—that for one fractured second, I thought Nola was out there.
But I don’t.
Because I know how that would sound.
Instead, I keep that part of me bottled up where it needs to stay.
It’s not time to share it.
Not yet.
Tonight, I’m watching Plum. I’ve seen bits and pieces of their show but haven’t sat through a full set. Normally, I show up before I go out to perform one of the duets Justine and I have, and then I bail. It’s been my modus operandi since the last tour. Mostly because I had Nola here, and I didn’t want to ignore her, and at the time, she was the most important person in my life.
Now, I think differently. I feel differently.
Honestly, the more I think about it, the more pissed off I get because instead of just ending our relationship, she’s kept me hanging on by a string. We have a few more stops until we’re in South Carolina, and I have no idea what to expect.
There’s a niggling voice in the back of my head telling me Nola’s not going to run to me, with her arms stretched outward, like you’d see in a movie, and jump into my arms. Shit’s going to be awkward and uncomfortable. We haven’t spoken, and frankly, I’m starting to ask myself what the fuck I am doing pining away for someone who clearly wants nothing to do with me.
But then that voice changes, and it reminds me of the time we’ve spent together, the years we’ve put into our relationship. We fell in love, and while I thought it was forever, maybe I’ve been blinded by the couples around me I look up to: my parents, Liam and Josie, JD and Jenna. They all found love. They’ve made it work with a life on the road, music in their veins, and even though Josie is the only one of the three who maintains a career, she doesn’t need to. Even Liam has expanded into entrepreneurship. What he and Josie are doing for Beaumont is amazing.
I’m tucked behind the rigging, watching Plum take the stage. The crowd hums with excitement, with the energy each performer needs to get through their set. There’s nothing like standing there, performing for a crowd that seems disinterested. With each stop, their popularity has increased. Yes, it helps that my sister insists on changing the set list, mixing up when I’m going to perform with Justine. It keeps the ticket buyers on their toes and in their seats when the show starts.
Justine has a duet with Liam as well, but Elle hasn’t said when he’ll join the tour. The fans will love that, and knowing how rabid 4225 West fans are, Elle will probably have to book another night at the venue or extend Liam’s schedule. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind either way.
The curtain rises, and the crowd roars to life. Plum doesn’t ease into their first song. Justine belts the first verse before lights, guitar, or drums can guide her. This drives the audience wild. For a brief second, they get nothing but Justine, and it’s a gift.