Total pages in book: 194
Estimated words: 187021 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 935(@200wpm)___ 748(@250wpm)___ 623(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 187021 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 935(@200wpm)___ 748(@250wpm)___ 623(@300wpm)
He crossed his arms and stared at her. Dr. Mafi’s relationship with Graves was fraught at best. They had been close before the Monster War while she was getting her medical degree. When things hadn’t worked out, he’d paid for her to finish, and she’d owed him for that ever since.
Kierse cleared her throat. “I learned recently that I had a spell put on me that made me forget my past. Since the spell…came down, my memories have been jumbled. I’ve tried several magical ways to recover them, but we’re—I’m—concerned that there might be something else wrong.”
Mafi’s gaze slipped to Graves. “There’s something that you can’t figure out?”
“We’re in your capable hands,” Graves said.
She narrowed her eyes at him as if he’d insulted her. “Tell me what you’ve tried so far.”
So Kierse took her through the magical treatment she’d tried from the market and her work with Graves. Mafi listened intently, asking questions and jotting down notes on a clipboard as Kierse explained. “So, Graves suggested that the issue might not be simply magical.”
Mafi nodded. “As much as I hate agreeing with him, it does sound possible. There are some tests we can run to see if there’s any damage to your brain, since you mentioned previous falls,” Mafi began. “I’ll set you up for an MRI first to rule out that possibility. Then we can discuss other options once we have the results in.”
Mafi went for the door, but Graves put his hand on it. “You’re going to keep your findings to yourself this time, right?”
She bristled under his scrutiny. “I’m a professional.”
“You were last time, too.”
“Then find someone else,” she challenged him. Graves stared her down, but it was Mafi who looked away first. “I won’t share it.”
“Good,” he said and released the door.
They ran a series of tests on her brain, all of which sucked in some way. The idea that her brain was somehow permanently damaged, either from Jason’s abuse or the spell, had never occurred to her. She had been worried about magical interference, not normal human stuff. It unsettled her to think that could be the problem.
Afterward, Kierse and Graves returned to the patient room to wait for the results. Almost an hour later, Mafi knocked and then entered. “Sorry about the wait. There was an emergency.”
“That’s all right,” Kierse said.
“I want to say first that the testing came back fine. Your MRI shows a very healthy brain.”
Kierse released a breath. “That’s good.”
“Yes. It’s very good, considering the potential brain trauma you discussed with me in your past. I don’t know if that spell helped you, or if your magic shielded you from worse pain, but whatever the case, that isn’t an issue here.”
“So…it’s just the spell, then?”
Mafi leaned back against the wall and considered. “I’m not sure that’s all it is. It’s not a brain injury. There’s no damage, that’s very clear. But I would think that, after everything you went through, you’re dealing with a significant amount of trauma.”
“Oh.”
Kierse glanced up at Graves, but he was as unreadable as ever. As if he didn’t want his opinion of the topic to influence however she was feeling. Not that she knew exactly what that was.
“The loss of your parents, your life on the streets, the subsequent Monster War.” Mafi glanced at Graves. “Working with a certain warlock. All of it has left its mark on you. If not physically, then mentally. The Monster War alone is enough trauma for any one lifetime. The fact that you went through it all.” She splayed her hands out. “Do you understand what I’m saying?”
“I had a tough life.”
“Yes,” Mafi said with a short laugh, “but not just that. Trauma can cause all sorts of changes in your brain and how it responds to stimuli. While common responses are anxiety and depression, it can shape who you are in other ways, like hyper-independence.”
Kierse blinked at her. “Okay? What does that have to do with my memories?”
“The spell might have taken your memory, but it’s possible that you repressed those memories all on your own as well. That what happened to you was so traumatic, your brain shut itself off from the pain.”
“Oh,” she said with wide eyes. “That sounds…possible.”
“You might find that as you work through these memories, whether with Graves,” she gestured to the walking memory machine in the room, “or alone, you might need to process them afterward, separately. Possibly with a professional.”
“Wait. Are you suggesting therapy?” Kierse asked with a stilted laugh.
“What’s wrong with therapy?”
“I don’t see how talking about my problems is going to fix them.”
“You’re the only one who can fix your problems.” Her pointed glance at Graves was telling. “But therapy gives you an outside perspective from a third party who isn’t involved in your life. They might help you see it from another angle. We have a psychiatrist on staff…”