Total pages in book: 93
Estimated words: 90464 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 452(@200wpm)___ 362(@250wpm)___ 302(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 90464 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 452(@200wpm)___ 362(@250wpm)___ 302(@300wpm)
Easton stares at me for so long I can’t keep from whimpering, “Please, can we forget tonight happened? I promise nothing like that will ever happen again.”
I’m confused when he looks disappointed. “Is that what you really want?”
Yes. I just want things to return to normal.
Sucking in a deep breath, I give him another pleading look. “Please. Lainey’s going through enough, and I don’t want my stupid actions upsetting her more.” I quickly gesture at him. “I also don’t want to upset you.”
His eyes narrow on me. “I’m the one who initiated the kiss.” He folds his arms over his chest. “I’m sorry I crossed the line.”
His words sink in, and I realize we were both at fault.
“You’re under a lot of pressure,” I say to stop him from feeling bad.
He shakes his head, and uncrossing his arms, he pushes his fingers through his hair before locking eyes with me and admitting, “I kissed you because I wanted to.”
I’ve been trying not to dissect the kiss, but now that he’s said the words, it’s impossible to ignore the fact that Easton kissed me with so much passion it ignited a fire between us.
He begins to move closer to me but stops and shakes his head again. “Christ, Nova. I’m falling head over fucking heels for you, and I thought you felt the same. Did I read things wrong between us?”
Easton is falling for me?
My lips part in shock, and I’m stunned for a moment before my emotions spiral out of control as happiness and worry war inside me.
Even though I love Easton, I can’t take a chance on the only dream I’ve ever had. I have to put Lainey first. If Easton and I get romantically involved and things don’t work out, it will disrupt Lainey’s entire life.
And I’ll lose him.
The thought of losing Easton and Lainey is unbearable, and I begin to shake my head. “It doesn’t matter how we feel. Lainey comes first.”
“I’m pretty sure she’ll be fine with us dating,” he says, his eyes not leaving my face for a second.
I shake my head again. “If we get romantically involved and it doesn’t work out, it will disturb Lainey’s life.” My chin quivers, my emotions completely out of control. “And I’ll lose your friendship. I’m not willing to take the risk.” I give Easton a pleading look. “This is the first time I feel like I belong somewhere and I have a purpose.”
Easton sucks in a deep breath before letting it out slowly. He turns his head and stares at the dressing table for painfully long minutes before he looks at me again.
“Are you attracted to me?”
My tongue darts out to wet my dry lips before I whisper, “It doesn’t matter how I feel.”
His features tighten, and his tone is tense as he asks, “Are you attracted to me, Nova?”
I feel like bursting out in tears, but I manage to keep control over the urge as I nod. “But—”
He takes a step toward me. “Do you love me?”
Oh God.
Trying to diminish my feelings for him, I reply, “Of course. I’ve known you all my life.”
When it looks like he’s going to fire another question my way, I hold up a hand. “Stop, Easton,” I beg, my heart thundering in my chest. “I just got out of a horrible relationship. We lost Rachel. Lainey needs us.” My voice cracks because I can’t have the one thing I’ve wanted for so many years. I can’t be selfish. “I just want . . .” I swallow hard as I force the lie over my lips, “I just want to be your friend so I can be there for you and Lainey.”
Sadness creeps into his eyes, and it takes a brutal swing at my heart. “If that’s what you really want.”
Unable to force the words over my lips again, I can only nod.
Easton turns around, and as he leaves my bedroom, my heart clenches painfully in my chest.
My hands fly up to cover my mouth so I can smother the sob as it escapes me.
No matter how badly I want Easton, I can’t be selfish. This is what’s best for everyone.
Chapter 22
Easton
After a shitty night’s sleep, I lie on my bed staring up at the ceiling.
I’ve gone over the kiss and conversation a million times, wishing things had played out differently.
Everything she said made sense. She just got out of an abusive relationship, and we have to think about Lainey.
The bastard in me was hoping Nova wanted me as much as I wanted her.
But damn, it sure felt like she wanted me when I kissed her.
She admitted to being attracted to me, and my gut tells me she loves me.
She just needs time.
My mind races to come up with a plan until I finally decide the only thing I can do is go on as usual.