Total pages in book: 129
Estimated words: 132097 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 660(@200wpm)___ 528(@250wpm)___ 440(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 132097 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 660(@200wpm)___ 528(@250wpm)___ 440(@300wpm)
“Well?” he says when I don’t respond. “Did you hear me say generous?”
“Oh my God, Ethan.” Margot puts a throw pillow over her face. “You asshole. Please tell me that’s not your final offer.”
“Listen,” I say, holding up a hand. “I didn’t agree to this any more than you did.”
He makes an impatient gesture. “Doesn’t matter. I’m finding a solution.”
“Feels more like bribery.” My anger grows with every second. “You’re trying to pay me off, and not very nicely. Have you heard of flattery? A couple hours ago, this was thrown at me the same way it was thrown at you, and now you barge in here demanding—”
“You let me in.” He shrugs.
Technically, my mom did, but that’s not the point.
“You were rude.”
“Tell him, Hattie!” Margot says from the sofa, lowering the pillow from her face.
“Not helping,” Ethan growls.
“If you want me to play along with your grand plan, you’re going to have to do a better job than—”
A deafening squeal behind us cuts me off mid-sentence.
Mom has finally left the kitchen and she’s speeding toward him with her hands outstretched. All my thoughts about taking Ethan down a peg or two evaporate.
“Ethan Blackthorn! Is it really you?” Mom practically throws herself into his arms, peppering his cheeks with kisses. She certainly wasn’t this happy to see me or Margot put together. “It’s been forever!”
He blinks at her, finally shocked into silence.
I don’t even think he knew she was here.
Fine.
Today, she can be my secret weapon. He’s clearly not thinking about how to bribe me into a fake marriage scheme anymore—not when he’s occupied with escaping Mom’s claws.
“Mrs. Sage,” he says after a pained second where I want to fall through the floor. I’ve heard the center of the earth is nice and balmy this time of year.
“Oh, no. Call me Julia.” She playfully slaps his arm. So cringe. I’m positive she’s not actually trying to flirt with him, considering the age gap, but it’s a little too close for comfort. “It’s been forever since we’ve seen you around these parts, Ethan.”
“I move around a lot. Spent some time in California,” he tells her, right before she starts up again.
“My, have you been working out? You look so handsome. You’ve certainly picked up your father’s good looks!”
Sigh.
Is spontaneous combustion real?
Or maybe I should just pray for the inevitable death of the sun to hurry up and scorch everything on the planet to cinders.
“Thanks, Julia,” he clips.
“So what brings you back to Maine? Are you staying in Portland again?”
“Mom!” I hiss.
“Oh, right!” Her catlike green eyes widen as she finally catches up with the feeling in the room. “Your granddad. I was so sorry to hear it. How could I have forgotten? I guess you’re here for his funeral? Closure?”
“Close enough,” Ethan mutters, his gaze cutting back to me.
I’m pretty sure my head is almost a tomato.
At some point, he’ll realize what a ginormous mistake he’s made by offering me a way out of this.
Mom lays a hand on Ethan’s arm, probably meant to be comforting, but she squeezes him like a slab of beef.
“You’re so warm,” she says, which is one of the most contrived excuses I’ve ever heard. “Come with me. I’ve got just the thing to cool you down.”
“No, that’s all right, I—” His protests are futile.
He might be the heir to a real estate empire worth bajillions, but he’s no match for Julia Sage when she wants to nurture.
I suppose it’s reassuring, knowing it’s not just me she tramples on.
Margot watches her big brother drag his feet into the kitchen. We follow him to the doorway, just in time to watch Mom pour him a tall glass of lovely green sludge.
His nose wrinkles as the stench fills the room.
It’s almost like fresh-cut lawn meets wet dog. Pungent and swampy as hell, the kind of fragrance only Shrek could love.
“Here you are. Bottom’s up!” Mom beams proudly.
Ethan takes the glass and stares at it like he’s holding a radioactive core. I can see his mind racing in his eyes, trying to find a way out of green doom.
But there’s no escape, so he holds his breath as he takes a baby sip, barely managing to hide his revulsion.
I press my hand over my mouth, holding in an explosive giggle.
Yes, that muck tastes as good as it smells. Possibly worse.
“We should save him,” I whisper to Margot.
“Nah. Trust me, he can use a few extra vegetables. Plus, a little humility for the way he came charging in, taking his bad luck out on you.” She’s watching everything with keen interest and a slightly vicious smile.
My anger has truly evaporated.
Sure, he was rude—when isn’t he?—but he’s had a pretty massive shock, and frankly, I wouldn’t want to fake marry me, either.
“Mom,” I call, stepping into the kitchen and eyeing the remaining kale juice like it’s liquid cyanide. “Ethan actually stopped by to see Margot. They have a lot of family stuff to talk about and it’s not the best time for smoothie samples.”