Total pages in book: 140
Estimated words: 137144 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 686(@200wpm)___ 549(@250wpm)___ 457(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 137144 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 686(@200wpm)___ 549(@250wpm)___ 457(@300wpm)
“I need some privacy, Harvey. Do you know how often my privacy has been taken from me without my permission?”
He pointed at her with a sigh. “If you fall over, I’m not going to be happy. Be careful. Call out if you need me.”
Then he moved to the counter and opened the cupboard, drawing out a toothbrush and toothpaste.
He left, and Lily let out a sigh. She slipped off her underwear and used the toilet before washing up. Then she got to brush her teeth and get rid of the rat-pee breath. That was a relief that she couldn’t explain.
Finally, she knew that she had to leave the safety of the bathroom and head out into the bedroom. Her legs were shaking a little by this stage, and she moved carefully so she didn’t fall over. When she opened the bathroom door, he was immediately there, scooping her up into his arms.
“You should have called me if you were feeling shaky,” he told her.
Then he carried her over to the bed where Michaela waited.
“Lily, how are you really feeling?” Michaela asked.
“My head is thumping, and I feel exhausted, even though I’ve done nothing. My stomach keeps rolling, and I don’t know why. I need my medicine. I’m not very well. Did it come up on the blood test you took?”
“Did what come up?” Michaela asked.
“What’s wrong with me,” she explained. “Did the blood test tell you, or do I need other tests?”
“What did they tell you was wrong with you, Lily?” Michaela asked.
“The doctor said there was something wrong with my nervous system.”
Yeah, that was right. Her nervous system.
“I wasn’t able to regulate it myself and the pills were meant to help.”
“What happened if you didn’t take the pills, Lily?” Michaela asked.
“If I don’t take my medication, I get out of control. I can’t stop myself from lashing out and hurting others.”
Michaela’s expression didn’t change, but she sensed that the other woman didn’t really agree with what she’d said.
“Right. And did you ever hurt somebody?” Michaela asked.
“Yes. Yes, I did.”
“Who?” Harvey asked as he stood at the end of the bed, his arms crossed over his chest. There was no smile on his face as he stared down at her. Had she upset him? Should she keep answering their questions if he wasn’t very happy?
Michaela turned to look at Harvey. “You might want to take it down a notch. You’re scaring her.”
Scaring her? Was he scaring her? Maybe a little bit.
She was surprised that Michaela would say something to him though. She wasn’t used to anyone sticking up for her. Rick would never have done that.
He’d never really cared about anyone but himself, had he? God, why had she agreed to marry him?
It was what Mother wanted.
Right. That was right. But why did she have to do what her mother wanted?
“I think it was my mother. I think I hurt my mother.”
“Okay, that sounds a bit odd to me,” Michaela told her. “I don’t know what you did to your mom to hurt her, but I think your doctor might have used it as an excuse to give you medicine that you didn’t need. Did he tell you what the medicine was?”
“And are you sure you hurt your mother?” Harvey asked.
“Yes, I did,” she said slowly as the memory returned. “She had scratches and bruises.”
And Lily had felt ashamed ever since.
“And do you remember giving her those scratches and bruises?” he asked.
“Yes,” she said with more certainty than she felt. She couldn’t piece together the entire thing.
The two of them shared a look, and she wished she knew what they were thinking.
“Did they explain the medication, Lily?” Michaela asked again.
She rubbed at her forehead. “Yeah, they did. They said it was something to calm down my nervous system, and it worked. I didn’t feel those rages anymore.”
“Did you feel much of anything?” Michaela asked.
“No, I guess not. I didn’t really feel happiness or sadness or fear. I was just numb. But the numb is a good thing. The numb means I can’t hurt anyone. The numb means people are safe around me.”
And the numb meant she didn’t have to think too much about her future, or about the things that she’d done in the past.
“So, Lily, on the front of the medicine bottle it says that it’s a mild sedative,” Michaela explained. “It shouldn’t have made you feel numb. And while it might be prescribed to someone who was feeling anxious and having issues sleeping, it doesn’t sound like it should have been prescribed to you.”
“Mild sedative? Well, probably a lot of people get prescribed that, don’t they?”
“Possibly,” Michaela said. “But again, it shouldn’t have made you feel numb. It shouldn’t have dulled your feelings and emotions.”
“So what are you saying?” Lily asked.
“The pills inside the bottle didn’t fully match the prescription on the outside of the bottle,” Harvey told her. “You weren’t taking a mild sedative.”