Total pages in book: 77
Estimated words: 77287 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 386(@200wpm)___ 309(@250wpm)___ 258(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 77287 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 386(@200wpm)___ 309(@250wpm)___ 258(@300wpm)
I’m so fucked up about you, Knox.
It’s too much.
Too vulnerable.
Because when you start to say things like don’t fuck other people, the natural next step is to be exclusive. To date. Be boyfriends. Be committed. And that’s something I’ve never, ever wanted. How could one hot frat boy be altering my architecture so much that I’m thinking about things I’ve never even considered before?
The panic starts to hit slowly. My whole life, I’ve only believed one thing: getting involved with anyone is a bad, bad road to go down.
I begin to jog off, and even as my head is spinning, my cock still aches like a goddamn weight between my legs.
Running away from him? As if that’ll stop you from having feelings for him?
I’m at war with myself, and I’m certain now that I’m going to lose.
When I feel my phone buzz in my pocket a minute later, I pull it out fast, desperate for a tether back to reality.
But it’s him.
Of course it’s you.
If you’re going to fuck with me like this, you should know something about me.
What’s that?
I’m needy. And impatient.
My cock throbs and I have to pause for a moment as I’m jogging, leaning up against a half-wall with a bed of colorful tulips below it. I’m still so desperate for him it hurts even as my mind is melting down.
Needy for…?
If no one else is allowed to fuck me, then you better give it to me. Anytime I want it.
Fuck.
Fuck, he’s perfect.
He’s perfect even when I’m acting like a complete basket case, making demands of him out of nowhere and then fleeing the scene because intimacy is the one thing in my life I have zero control over.
And that’s what’s different about him, I realize.
Intimacy scares me, but with him, it doesn’t feel difficult at all.
It would be harder to ignore it than to give in.
It’s always right there crackling between us, and the moment I let slip that I didn’t want anyone else touching him, it became clear that it’s a need.
I’m practically vibrating out of my skin as I tap out a reply to him, my heart slamming inside my chest.
I have a Double Daggers house meeting tonight. Find me afterward, and I’ll give you the cock you need so badly.
Nope. I’m needy. I want you sooner than that. I’ll come to the Daggers house before the meeting, so be ready.
I get back to the Daggers house and the front door slams behind me even though I don’t mean for it to.
Everything feels off. Like I’m not myself. Maybe like I’m coming down with something bad.
I head to the kitchen, needing hydration.
I know what it feels like to go too far, because I’ve done it many times, usually when it comes to taking physical fights further than they need to go.
But this is different.
“Berlant,” somebody says from behind the fridge door, where I’m currently leaning my head in to catch the cold air. “How’d it go?”
I lean back and swing the fridge shut, seeing Kieran leaning on the counter. I wipe at my mouth with the back of my hand.
“My run?”
He rolls his eyes. “Your run with Weston, dude.”
Shock hits my nerves like ice.
“What?”
“You were running with him. I just walked back from Econ class. Saw you jogging alongside him.”
Fucking Christ.
“It was just a run, Kieran.”
“You must be getting some kind of dirt if you’re friendly enough to go on runs with the guy. Does he trust you yet?”
He really shouldn’t.
“I think he does,” I tell Kieran.
“Did he say anything about the alumni dinner next week?”
My chest tightens as I chug more of the water, looking away from Kieran. A couple other Daggers guys just headed downstairs and are filing into the kitchen now, raiding the fridge behind me.
I think of the note I saw scrawled over Noah’s planner.
VIP - Private table - Onyx Only. Talk with Roman and Wes beforehand.
It’s something I would normally divulge to Kieran, but I can’t bring myself to say it. It’s possible that Roman is using his mafia connections to pay off some of the alumni, but it’s not guaranteed from what the note says.
And I don’t want Kieran fucking with Weston.
The thought of him touching Wes makes me murderous.
“We didn’t talk about the dinner. I’ll try to talk to him sometime this week. Don’t you have better things to be worrying about?”
Kieran furrows his brow, suddenly going serious. “You know why it matters to me, Sev. I need a good internship this summer, and I want it to be with the Callahan firm. It’s not like I have opportunities handed to me like the Knox brothers do.”
A knock comes from the front door and my blood pressure spikes.
“That might be the sandwich I ordered,” Kieran says.
“No. I’ll go get it,” I tell him.
I head straight for the front door, pulling it open.