The Egomaniac – A Romantic Comedy Read Online Penelope Bloom

Categories Genre: Funny, Romance Tags Authors:

Total pages in book: 85
Estimated words: 79522 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 398(@200wpm)___ 318(@250wpm)___ 265(@300wpm)

Read Online Books/Novels:

The Egomaniac - A Romantic Comedy

Author/Writer of Book/Novel:

Penelope Bloom

Book Information:

The bestselling author Penelope Bloom brings a brand new hilariously uplifting romance where the chemistry explodes between two total opposites.
Something is very wrong with my downstairs neighbor. For starters? She appears completely immune to my charms. It’s odd. Downright suspicious, even.
But beneath those frowns and pantsuits, I know she feels the connection, too. Why else would she keep filing noise complaints against me? It’s like a cry for help. A demand for me to show up at her door…
She has the face of a princess and the boring, laminated agenda life of a future cat-lady. I can see she needs my skills. Badly.
I happen to have a talent for people — fixing them, persuading them… pleasing them.
Except my past rears its ugly head at the worst time. Instead of dating my neighbor, now I’m roped into working with her. But what’s more romantic than a forbidden office fling?
I’ll find a way to solve my secret little issue and make time for my new office mate. On the clock, off the clock, on her desk, on my desk…
But first, she needs to agree to go on a date with me. I think her exact words were “absolutely no way.”
No way? There’s always a way. There’s blackmail, bribery, buckets of charm… Maybe all three?
*Full-length office rom com about a grouchy bosswoman who has forgotten how to have fun and her obnoxiously charming neighbor turned co-worker who won’t stop until he wins a smile. Hilarious banter, crackling chemistry, and a gooey happily-ever-after await if he can find a way past her fangs.
Books by Author:

Penelope Bloom



Who ever said owning a healthy assortment of exotic pets was a problem? Apparently, my downstairs neighbor did.

A noise complaint? I looked around my penthouse apartment for the most likely suspects. Rat, my giant monitor lizard, dragged his scaly belly across the ground as he passed by. He was molting, so it sounded a bit like furniture scraping across sandpaper. Then there was my parrot, Windbag. He squawked and flapped his wings by the window. A moment later, Mr. Meatball, one of my cats, failed a jump towards the window and knocked my laptop to the ground with a clatter.

“Well,” I said, dusting my hands together. “It looks like I’m just going to have to buy the downstairs neighbor out of their apartment, won’t I?”

I tossed on a coat, ran a hand through my hair, then headed for the elevator. There were a few work tasks I needed to handle before dinner, but one of the primary benefits of being the best at what you do is getting to make your own schedule. In other words, I’d get to the work when I got to it. My partners knew by now that they couldn’t rush my genius, anyway.

My downstairs neighbor was in apartment 4B. I knocked my knuckles in a cheery little rhythm on the door and waited, hands in my pockets.

To my mild surprise, a young woman opened the door. It was six in the evening on a Saturday, but she wore an outfit fit for the boardroom. She had her blonde hair pulled back into a no-nonsense ponytail. Her skirt was cream colored to match her modest, silky top. I felt immediately curious to know what she was like between the sheets. Stiff as a stone? Scowling while she mechanically rocked her hips? I wondered if she could even un-purse her lips long enough to give a proper blowjob.

“What do you want?” she asked. She actually managed to look me straight in the eye and without the slightest hint of red in her cheeks.

Oh, my, I thought. It wasn’t every day that I met a woman who didn’t get nervous at the sight of me. Well, that was fixable. The plan had been to buy her out, but that was when I pictured some grouchy, balding man. But this woman practically had the word “challenge” buzzing over her head in gaudy neon lights. And I’d always been drawn to bright lights.

I flashed my best smile, then planted my hand on her door frame. “There’s some kind of mix-up,” I said. “The apartment manager just told me you filed a noise complaint.”

“And?” she asked. She folded her arms. They were just slightly toned. Mrs. Boardroom kept herself in shape. The more I looked at her, the more I liked what I saw. She held her face in an expression between a scowl and a frown, but I knew I’d be able to fix that with a little alone time.