Total pages in book: 169
Estimated words: 161535 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 808(@200wpm)___ 646(@250wpm)___ 538(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 161535 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 808(@200wpm)___ 646(@250wpm)___ 538(@300wpm)
“I didn’t know what to expect, to be honest. I just knew I’d do whatever it took to save David.”
“Because you loved him more than you loved life itself,” he states.
I pause, because he makes it sound so simple, so altruistic. I don’t know if I think of it like that. I don’t know if I ever have. “It’s not that. It’s…” I drum my fingers on my lips, trying to think of how to express just how I feel about David and the sacrifices he’s made. “When my parents passed away, it was a very sudden surprise. They were young and hadn’t planned for it. David was twenty-two at the time and I was fifteen. Rather than send me into state care, he adopted me and took care of me from then on. It meant putting aside his college education and his dreams to work and take care of me. He kept us together when it would have been easier for him to walk away, but he wanted things to be as normal as they could be for me. I got to go to the same schools, to live in the same house, and graduate with my friends. David worked two jobs to make ends meet. And then when I graduated and started college, he wanted to start his classes again, but he got sick. Suddenly he couldn’t work and his insurance wouldn’t cover his treatments. He was so weak and so sick, and I’d always seen my brother as strong and capable. I knew it was my turn to help. So I did.”
I think back on those dark years, when I worked every shift I could, and drove David to his chemo sessions. To the long days afterwards, in which David endured horrible sickness because the cure is almost as bad as the disease. To being exhausted with no end in sight, but knowing I had to keep going, because David needed me. To seeing all the bills coming in and knowing we couldn’t pay them.
We’d lost my parents’ house and moved into an apartment, and I smiled and told David it was fine. That it was closer to David’s hospital. Less driving, and wasn’t that a bonus? Just like I never “minded” getting extra shifts because wouldn’t it be nice to have a bit more extra cash? Never mind that I was exhausted. Never mind that I felt just as hopeless as David sometimes. Someone had to bring the cheer, and I wore that responsibility like a cloak.
“I don’t know if it was altruism,” I say softly. “But I knew what it was like for him to be sick, and I’d have done anything to save him from that again.”
“I still think you’re too soft. You need to toughen up.”
Laughing, I shake my head. “If I was tougher, you and I would probably already be dead. Or we’d be working with Seth. There’s nothing wrong with feeling things for people. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to spare someone pain, especially if you love them.”
“But would he have done the same for you?” Kalos asks.
“Does it even matter?”
“To me it does.” He picks up one corner of his sodden cloak and wrings it out.
He would have. Hadn’t David already given up years of his twenties just to take care of a bratty younger sister? “I wouldn’t have asked him to.”
“He didn’t ask you to do this.”
“No, he didn’t. And he wouldn’t have. We’re both martyrs like that. We shoulder the burdens and hope that the other person has a better life.” I hug my sodden clothing closer to me. It’s cold and I’m wet and miserable but thinking about David reminds me of what I’m doing this for, and for some reason, the weather seems less awful now. “Doesn’t matter. I don’t know why my volunteering bothers you so much.”
“Because people are taking advantage of your goodwill,” Kalos grumbles. “And I don’t like that.”
“No one is taking advantage of me,” I chide him gently. “I knew exactly what I was getting into.”
“Yes, and now you’re stuck with me.”
“I’m not ‘stuck.’” I nudge him with my shoulder. “I don’t feel stuck, or trapped, just for the record. We’re friends and we’re working together.”
He ‘hmms’ again in that vague, noncommittal response. “I am sorry you had to give up your world and family to be with me. I know how difficult it can be when you’re stuck in a place you don’t want to be.”
And he gestures vaguely at our surroundings, even as the rain begins to patter down again.
I bite back a chuckle. “Someone up there is definitely trying to make you suffer.” At his wry look, I adjust my wet hood over my head, shielding my eyes so the rain doesn’t fall directly onto my face. “As for leaving home, I do miss my brother, but it’s not so bad here. The biggest regret I have is that I won’t be able to watch him flourish. Because I have to believe that Lachesis was telling me the truth, and David is going to have an amazing life.”