Total pages in book: 102
Estimated words: 101758 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 509(@200wpm)___ 407(@250wpm)___ 339(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 101758 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 509(@200wpm)___ 407(@250wpm)___ 339(@300wpm)
Anything could happen that would make him forget me.
“Hey, are you okay? You just went really pale.”
I shake myself out of my own thoughts and force a smile.
“Yeah, sorry. I get nervous. Must be the medical professional in me.”
But she doesn’t buy it. Brit’s eyes narrow. “Uh-huh.”
A whistle blows, and Xander skates off the ice, stopping in front of his coaches to talk.
“Looks like they’re going to wrap up,” Britney says. “I’ll head in to work. But I’ll see you tonight. Feel free to come early, and we can sample some of the food before everyone else gets there.”
With a grin, I nod at her. “Sounds good. I’ll text you when I’m on my way.”
Britney heads out, and I join the other medical staff as we talk to Xander.
“Any instability?” I ask him, watching his face closely.
“No, I felt good. Any hesitation was mental. The knee feels normal.”
“It’s your first practice, so that’s to be expected,” someone else says, and I let the others do the talking as I soak in all the information around me.
“Let’s go stretch,” I say at last. “And cool you down.”
Xander nods. “I’ll just go change and be right there.”
He winks at me before he walks into the locker room, and I turn around to find the head of the team medical staff, Dr. Watkins, smiling at me.
“Uh-oh. Are you smiling because I’m in trouble?”
He laughs and shakes his head. “Not at all. We’ve all been impressed with Xander’s progress, and the bulk of that has to do with the fact that he had you working with him.”
I feel the flush make its way through my cheeks, and I nod. “Thank you. He was eager to heal, and honestly, he’s my favorite player, so I want to see him back on the ice too.”
Dr. Watkins nods. “I’d like to offer you a job, Ivy.”
I blink at him, sure I’ve heard him wrong. “I’m sorry?”
“We’d like you to join the team permanently and work with any players that need you. We always try to keep injuries minimal, but there’s usually someone who needs to work out a sprained shoulder, tweaked ribs, and the occasional torn knee. You’re excellent and would be a valuable asset to the team.”
Holy shit.
This is literally my dream job.
“Sir, you need to know that Xander and I—”
“I know.” He shrugs a shoulder. “You’re nothing but professional when we’re working together, but I see it. Obviously I wouldn’t ask you to not be with him, but I would ask you to refrain from any other relationships with our players.”
I snort at that. “Xander would kill us all. I wouldn’t do that.”
He waits quietly, watching me.
“I think I need to think about this. I’m honored that you offered me the position.”
“We would sit down and talk about salary and benefits, your schedule, and everything else if you’re interested in the job.”
“Of course.” I take a breath and nod. “Thank you.”
“You have my number. Just let me know.”
He nods and walks away, and holy fucking shit.
Do I want to leave Montana? Do I want to quit my job?
It would give me the opportunity to be with Xander all the time. No long distance relationship for us.
But what if it falls apart and I’m stuck working for his team?
Stop thinking about it falling apart.
“Hey, Red,” Xander says as he strolls out of the locker room. “Ready?”
“Of course.”
I know I’m spiraling.
I feel it, and I can’t stop it. Because I’m terrified.
I haven’t had anxiety like this in a while. Since Xander and I have been together, which seems like it started the moment I walked into his house, he’s been able to calm me without even trying. He soothes me just by being close to me. I didn’t freak out when my mom was at her worst or when the bar burned down.
I took all that in stride, really. Of course, on the outside, I never show how badly I’m freaking. That wasn’t an option growing up with my mother. She wasn’t exactly the reassuring type. So when the bullying got to be too much in high school, or just everything Brenda did sent me into a spiral, I kept a smile firmly on my face.
And died a little inside.
No one ever noticed. Maybe because I didn’t have close friends, or because no one cared enough about me to pay attention.
Despite doing so well over the past months, I’m not okay now. All I can think about is Xander getting hurt and forgetting me. It started when he mentioned that he had to come to Denver for work, and as this trip got closer, and then after that shift at the hospital the other day with the dementia patient, it’s all I can think about.
I’m driving myself nuts. I know I’m being irrational.
But I can’t stop it.
Thanks, anxiety.