Total pages in book: 121
Estimated words: 116759 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 584(@200wpm)___ 467(@250wpm)___ 389(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 116759 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 584(@200wpm)___ 467(@250wpm)___ 389(@300wpm)
Beth patted my hand. “Then you start living life for you. I know you’re busy, but maybe dating would be a good way to move on from this nonrelationship with Sebastian. Hogmanay is the perfect night to start. No-strings fun can be found anywhere on Hogmanay.”
There was a desperate part of me that wanted to do just that. To find some quick fix to get over Sebastian Thorne. “I did get invited to a Hogmanay party.”
“Then you should go. You’re twenty-two, Lily, and you look like you’re carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. You should start enjoying yourself and stop putting life off because you have exams and papers and a dissertation. Trust this former workaholic who had no life. Find the balance now so you don’t wake up at forty wondering why all you have to show for your time on this planet is work. I mean, that’s great if that’s all you want, but I know that’s not all you want.”
Her advice settled on me with gravity.
She was right.
Even if Sebastian hadn’t come into my life, I knew I’d still have buried my head in school. Maybe it was burnout from dating. Or maybe it was easier to stop looking for love than to endure the heartache of continuing to look for it.
I didn’t want to live my life like that.
I wanted to keep searching, even when it hurt. Because I had something some people didn’t. I had living proof from my parents, from my aunts and uncles, and from Beth … true love existed. And it was worth the growing pains and the inconvenience and all the disruption it brought.
It was worth searching for.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
SEBASTIAN
Icouldn’t remember a worse Christmas.
The incident with Lily had already cast a pall over the holidays and I had this niggling sense of dread that wouldn’t abate. It was like waiting for medical test results. When I returned to Edinburgh, would I still have Lily, or would she choose to walk away? What would I do if she did? Because at this point, it would be like losing a limb.
Then there were my bloody parents.
Mum was surprisingly taciturn. Not in an unpleasant way but in a distracted, preoccupied way. She didn’t complain about Dad once. The royal estate wasn’t far from ours, so Mum left for church on Christmas morning to spend it with my grandmother, my great-aunt, and the entourage of princes and princesses who were my cousins. I’d spoken to my grandmother that morning on the phone and she’d asked me to come to church and Christmas lunch with the family at the Hillingham House, the royal estate. I’d told her I’d promised to spend Christmas morning with my father.
“A bad business that.” Granny had sighed heavily in response. “I do wish your parents would stop being so moronic.”
I’d snorted unhappily. “Me too, Granny. Me too.”
It was a relief to leave the house without Mum watching us go. To know that she was preoccupied with the family while we visited with Dad. Juno and I didn’t have to deal with watery eyes or pinched lips that made us feel guilty for loving our own father as we stepped out.
“I met someone,” Juno announced abruptly as we got into Mum’s SUV.
I raised an eyebrow. “Met someone, met someone? You?”
My sister’s eyes were comically wide with dazed panic. “I’m as surprised as you are. I think I’m still surprised.”
Confused, I asked, “When? When did you meet this person?”
“Two months ago. At a friend’s dinner party. I thought it was only friendship, but it’s turned into more.”
Hitting uncomfortably close to home with her words, I shifted in the driver’s seat. “I don’t understand. You were set on a life of singledom. Of freedom. Especially after witnessing this rubbish.” I gestured toward the house.
“I … I was.” There was a hesitant silence from my sister before she blurted, “Until I met Leona. That’s a woman’s name, by the way, because she’s a woman.”
I almost hit the brakes. “You’re gay? Since when?”
“I won’t insult you by suggesting that tone is judgmental.”
“It’s not!” I hurried to assure her. “I’m just taken aback. I mean, Juno, you’re not exactly a person who would be concerned with hiding your sexuality. I know more about your sex life than any brother should ever have to.”
Juno gave a bark of laughter. “True. To be honest … I’ve never fancied a girl before Leona. I fell in love with her. She just happens to be a woman.”
My pulse raced a bit. “You’re in love?”
“Weird, isn’t it? But yeah. I was trying to deny it, but I’m totally in love with her and kind of scared shitless but also, like, possibly the happiest I’ve ever been in my life.”
Pulling up outside Dad’s cottage, I turned to my sister. She was uncharacteristically threading her fingers nervously together in her lap. “Why do you look so worried about it, then?”