Total pages in book: 46
Estimated words: 43402 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 217(@200wpm)___ 174(@250wpm)___ 145(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 43402 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 217(@200wpm)___ 174(@250wpm)___ 145(@300wpm)
Blade just nods, quietly. “Okay, Livy,” he murmurs, holding me tightly. “You’re going to be okay.”
“Blade, sweetheart, I am okay. For the very first time, I feel like my past and the rape doesn’t own me anymore.”
“How many men have you been with since the rape?” he asks.
I frown. I didn’t expect him to ask that at all. I hesitate, then tell the truth. “Once. It was… a disaster. I thought I could do it, but I froze and it wasn’t good. After that, I stopped trying. Then, later, I fell in love once—but we didn’t go that far. We were starting to, but I found out he had someone else. I found out by accident. I’m not sure he would have told me, although I think he would have eventually.”
Blade’s expression hardens. “The fucker was married and didn’t tell you?”
“It’s complicated. He begged me to not give up on him, even promised he would leave her. She was a good person though. She was even planning to start a family with this guy. I couldn’t destroy all of that. There’s no way I wanted my happiness to be built on her misery. Besides, deep down, I knew we were too different.”
“Do you still see him?” he asks, and I can hear a different tone in his voice now—almost like jealousy.
“Occasionally,” I admit. “We’re good friends.”
“I have to tell you, sweetheart. I’m fucking possessive normally, but that’s a whole other level when it comes to you and I’m not sure I like that you’re still in touch with this asshole.”
“There’s nothing between us,” I say firmly. “Never will be. I’m actually closer to his—” I pause, forcing the word out, “—his wife these days.” That’s not a lie, not the complete truth either, but I’m hoping it makes him understand he truly doesn’t need to worry about any of it.
Blade frowns, while staring thoughtfully. Then, he sighs. “Okay, Usdi. I’ll try and control my urge to hunt down the bastard and force him to move to another country.”
I giggle, before leaning up to kiss him. “My big, bad protector. I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
I brush his chest with my fingertips, trying to lighten the heaviness and tension that I can still feel inside him. “I’d love to stay in bed with you all day, Blade, but I have to get Dad settled and then get to work.”
He smiles faintly. “That’s okay. I need to get moving, too.” A slow grin spreads across his face. “Maybe we could shower together.”
I blink. “Really?”
He chuckles, eyes warm. “You’ve never done that with anyone, have you?”
I shake my head, cheeks burning. “No.”
He grins wider. “I like that. It means I’ll be the only man who gets to introduce you to shower sex and wash your beautiful body while I worship you.”
“Maybe it will be me who worships you, Blade.”
He sits up, pulls me into his arms, kissing me until the world falls away again. “Anything you want to do to me, Usdi, I give you permission to do. After all, I belong to you now.”
“I like that,” I whisper, my fingers playing in his hair, my body fitting perfectly against his. He stands, still holding me, and I laugh as he lifts me easily. I wrap my legs around his waist and hold on—completely happy. “Blade—” I giggle, breathless.
“Shh.” He presses his forehead to mine. “Let’s start the day right.”
He carries me into the bathroom, a smile on his face. The light spilling in through the windows. Our combined laughter echoing softly between us. For the first time in my life, I feel whole—like every broken piece of me finally fits again. As the water starts to run and Blade’s arms tighten around me, one thought slips through my mind.
I will not allow my brother to take anything else from me.
I won’t allow it. I’m done being a victim.
17 BEAR
I’m alone in my office, the clubhouse breathing around me like a beast half-asleep. I spoke to Olivia earlier. I was shocked when she called, but she wanted to share her happiness with me and tell me that she’d finally told Blade part of the truth. God, the joy in her voice was a deep pain, but also good. I want her to be happy—no matter how it cuts out my heart. Still, despite her being relaxed and full of happiness, I knew Blade would be here soon. He’d be demanding that I let him tell her the truth. I can’t allow it. I’m not worried about her letting our secrets out—despite what I keep telling him. No, the truth is, if Olivia finds out Blade’s my little brother, it wouldn’t be good. If she discovered he was my Vice President, it would worse. Olivia would cut him off and probably me, too. I can’t risk that. I’m staying sane by having her in my life. If that ends …