Total pages in book: 38
Estimated words: 36482 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 182(@200wpm)___ 146(@250wpm)___ 122(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 36482 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 182(@200wpm)___ 146(@250wpm)___ 122(@300wpm)
That time is now.
It’s time to put his money where his mouth is.
Derek
I fucked up.
Bad.
And it kills me.
As much as I hated the words that came out of his mouth, they were absolute truth. He’s right. I’ve been hiding him. From Casey, from Reid, from everyone. In my head, we were a separate island together. It was exhilarating and beautiful and private.
Not realistic, though.
Completely unfair.
In a way, I’ve treated him worse by hiding him than those men who took actual advantage of him when he was younger. I’m a selfish prick.
I think I’m going to be sick.
After racing through cleaning the kitchen, I make my way back up the stairs, strip down to my boxers, and lie down in my bed. My heart aches and my brain hurts. I only thought I wanted to feel. This shit sucks.
I’m trying to give Riko the space he requested before he went to shower, but it’s difficult. I want to beg for him to forgive me and for us to go back to how we were before I pulled out the rubber rings making promises that no doubt must’ve felt empty to him. Something shifted after that and it’s been a shitshow ever since.
I wait for what feels like hours and then I hear his soft footsteps on the carpet in my room. My heart hammers in my chest and a breath of relief rushes out of me when he climbs into bed. When I grab him and pull him to me, he goes willingly. We cling to each other. It’s quiet and tense. But holding him is something and I’m grateful for it.
“I want to introduce you to my parents,” I say, voice soft and trembling. “Let’s go one day this week. And maybe after we can go to the bakery and get some cookies.”
“No fair,” he grumbles. “You’re trying to get me back in your good graces with snickerdoodle goodness.”
“I’m desperate,” I admit with a chuckle. “Anything to make things right with you.”
He sighs heavily. “I know you feel bad. It’s not fair for me to make you suffer any longer.”
“I deserve it.”
“No,” he whispers, “you don’t. This is new for the both of us. I feel like we’re going to fuck things up here and there. I’m really good at fucking shit up.”
“Apparently so am I. Guess we make a good couple.”
He pulls back slightly and studies me. I kiss the tip of his nose.
“We’re a couple now?” he says, smiling. “Not just fuckbuddies?”
I cup his cheek. “We were never just fuckbuddies.”
“You always say the right things to make me forgive you.”
“I’m learning.”
His teasing smile eases the ache in my soul. “There’s something you still owe me. It’s deserved after tonight.”
“Dessert?”
“Hell yeah. Get to eating, Dere-Dere.”
It only takes a few minutes with my tongue inside his ass for him to fully forgive me.
I peek out the front window to check on Riko and the kids. They’re both standing close to him, heads tilted up, and listening intently to whatever he’s saying. It’s adorable. Seeing him interact with them, doing something he loves, warms my heart. Sensing my presence, Riko looks over his shoulder toward the window and blows me a kiss. I grin and then head back inside to finish cooking one of the few things I’m good at. Frozen chicken nuggets. The timer dings and I pull them out of the oven.
Movement through the window out back near the pond catches my attention and I notice Casey and Clara out with the baby. Casey is squatting while holding onto the stroller and Clara bends over to touch her head.
Something’s wrong.
I turn off the oven and then slip out the back door. It’s weird actually coming out here to see her after all this time. But, it’s long overdue. If we’re going to be neighbors, we need to at least be civil.
“Casey,” I say as I approach them. “Everything okay? Where’s Brayden?”
Her head snaps up and she gapes at me in shock. “Oh, hey. Uh, he’s at the rental property.”
“Are you sick?”
“That’s puke,” Clara snips, pointing a finger at the grass behind them. “But thank you, Captain Obvious.”
And to think I defended this girl a couple of weeks ago. She’s a good friend to Casey, but a total bitch to me now.
“It’s fine,” Casey mutters as she stands upright. “I’m fine. Nauseous all day every day. My mom thinks this one will be a girl.”
I drop my eyes to her stomach in shock. “You’re pregnant again?”
A flash of sadness flickers in her eyes. I know we’re both thinking about her first loss. Our loss. But she’s gone on to finally get the family she wants and deserves. I’m surprised, I guess, to learn of another pregnancy so soon after she had her son.
“Just found out a couple of weeks ago,” she says, nodding. “I can hardly work. My clients probably hate me.”