Total pages in book: 100
Estimated words: 93948 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 470(@200wpm)___ 376(@250wpm)___ 313(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 93948 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 470(@200wpm)___ 376(@250wpm)___ 313(@300wpm)
I follow her gaze to where the redhead is currently engaged in an animated conversation with the witch, her hands moving rapidly as she speaks. “Does she know that?”
“We’ve spoken about it,” Lizzie says stiffly. “By the time we reach our destination, I expect to be victorious.”
At that, I twist to look at her. She’s glaring at the deck as if it insulted her personally. I don’t know what it says about me that Lizzie in a foul mood amuses me greatly. “Does she know you intend to murder your way through Morrigan’s crew? You know how Maeve feels about murder.”
“Don’t be smug.” She shrugs stiffly. “With stakes as high as they are, she’s willing to waive her determination to save every lost soul who crosses her path.”
Love is so strange. It changes a person, and watching it happen in real time is admittedly odd. I can’t help but think of all the ways I’ve changed since Bastian and I started our relationship. I want to say it’s all been for the best, but now I wonder.
When you’re happy, it’s so easy to make excuses to remain safe. Even at the cost of others’ lives.
I shake myself and push to my feet. “Nox has the ability to incapacitate the crew by restricting blood flow to their brains. You can turn their own blood against them. It’s a good plan.” There will be crew members who have shields their magic can’t penetrate, though, and that’s what I’m worried about.
“Yes, it is.” Lizzie watches me closely. “And it doesn’t require your presence on that ship.”
“Gods, not you, too.” I’ve had to sit through lectures by Nox, Bowen, and now apparently Lizzie about how the head of the rebellion shouldn’t put herself at risk.
As if I haven’t been at risk from the moment I was born. As if that risk hasn’t increased exponentially now that I’m supposed to be dead.
But that’s not something I can say, not without explaining why I take the Cŵn Annwn’s perversion of the originals’ vision so personally. A problem to deal with later, one we won’t have to worry about if we don’t successfully save Bastian from being brought before the Council.
The mood on the deck shifts, and I know without looking that Nox has emerged from their cabin. They don’t say anything, but they don’t need to. Their energy draws the crew’s spines straight and makes the people want to please them, to say something to make them laugh, to bring a smile to their sharp mouth.
Even as I tell myself not to look, I can’t help twisting in their direction. It’s like turning to face the sun. Damn it, I can’t let my continuing attraction to them muddy the waters. There’s a reason I’ve kept my distance from them over the years, and it’s not just because I fell in love with their ex.
If Bastian distracted me from the ugly parts that come with being leader of a rebellion, then Nox would have made me careless in a truly dangerous way. They are the kind of person the unwary can get lost in, and if I’d like to think I would never allow that to happen, the temptation to simply live for myself and no other…it’s stronger than I want to admit. My entire life has been in service, first to my parents and then to the rebellion. I can’t stumble now.
No matter how exhausted I am.
Even now, I’m having a hard time not going to them, not leaning on their strength the same way I did in their cabin a few days ago. I remind myself I am Siobhan, leader of the rebellion, and I cannot afford to falter…and yet I crumbled when it was just us.
I crumbled, and they didn’t make me feel worse because of the weakness. They simply met my despair with a plan of action that has a solid chance of being successful.
They look particularly good right now, with their head held high and their crimson coat trailing behind them in the wind of our passage. Their pale skin seems made for the color, but I’d love to see them in anything but the hated bloody tone that represents everything wrong in this world.
Someday…
“Well, I can’t fault your taste.” Lizzie rises. “I’m serious, though, Siobhan. Trying to bully your way into that rescue attempt when we have an entire crew of people willing and capable of being successful is a silly, reckless thing to do.”
It’s a sign of how rattled I am that I actually snarl at her. “Since when do you actually consider yourself part of a crew?”
Lizzie doesn’t blink, but her eyes flash crimson, a sure sign of her irritation. “I’m not Nox or Evelyn or even Bowen. I’m not going to argue circles with you. If you try to join the rescue attempt, I’m going to knock you the fuck out.” She turns away. “It doesn’t matter if you see me coming. You can’t do a damn thing to stop me.”