Total pages in book: 69
Estimated words: 63842 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 319(@200wpm)___ 255(@250wpm)___ 213(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 63842 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 319(@200wpm)___ 255(@250wpm)___ 213(@300wpm)
“Penny for your thoughts,” I said, immediately regretting the cliché.
But Jade didn’t seem to mind. “I was just thinking…” She took a deep breath. “This is the first time in months I’ve felt like myself. Maybe longer than that. Not someone’s punching bag or sex toy. Not a victim or someone’s betrayer or… damaged goods. Just Jade.”
The simplicity of it hit me hard. How basic and yet impossible that feeling must have seemed to her until now. “Good,” was all I could manage to say.
The current pushed gently at the wooden posts beneath us, water flowing endlessly away from here. Away from the pain and heartache. Of terror and violence. We sat side by side in the fading light, just two people watching a sunset, pretending for a little while that was all we needed to be.
Chapter Six
Jade
I shifted from foot to foot at the edge of the community room, counting the women who’d already gathered on the blue exercise mats spread across the floor. Five of them, all wearing some variation of sweatpants, T-shirts, hair pulled back, and soft sneakers. Hannah had mentioned the self-defense class yesterday, suggested I might benefit from it. I’d nodded and smiled, thinking I’d find an excuse not to come. Yet here I was, arms wrapped tight around myself, watching Rip and Caleb adjust the mats in the center of the circle. Rip’s large form seemed somehow less intimidating than it should have been.
Three days had passed since our afternoon at the pier. I couldn’t help but look to see if I caught his eye across the room whenever I saw him. I wanted to sit and study him. Just… look at him. Observe. He always made a point to stop and talk to me every day. More than once. I felt like our brief conversations helped me make it through each hour sometimes, grounded me in some fundamental way.
Now he stood in the middle of this makeshift training space, black T-shirt stretched across his broad shoulders, tattoos peeking out from beneath the short sleeves. I liked looking at him as a man, as someone I wanted to be with. Not for the sex. For security and protection. Rip had proven he wanted to make me comfortable. I wanted to think he felt a connection with me that made him want to keep me safe from my nightmares.
Which was totally ridiculous. I was a cheater. Who’d fucked my best -- and only -- friend’s boyfriend. I didn’t deserve someone as kind and protective as Rip. Not in a million years.
I thought about leaving. I even turned to go, but Penny stopped me. “You joining us?” Penny asked, appearing at my elbow. She smiled so kindly at me, like she truly wanted me to be there. I didn’t deserve her kindness either.
“I’m not sure I should.” The words tumbled out before I could stop them.
She gave me a gentle smile. “Neither was I the first time. But it helps. With any frustrating problem.” She inclined her head toward the circle. “Come on. You can stand next to me.”
Before I could form another excuse, she’d guided me onto a mat. Rip saw me moving to join them immediately. He gave a small nod of acknowledgment, nothing more.
“We’ll start simple today,” he said, his deep voice carrying easily without shouting. “The goal isn’t to win a fight. It’s to create space so you can get away.”
There was something surreal about watching Rip, a large and intimidating man, show so much care as he demonstrated techniques. I’d never seen someone with such infinite patience, no matter how many times he had to explain or demonstrate something. Caleb, too. The young man took as much care with the women and kids as all the men did.
Not for the first time, I thought this had to be the strangest place I’d ever been. And I absolutely loved it here. I never wanted to leave, but I knew I’d have to. Soon. This was Mia’s home. Not mine.
Rip and Caleb demonstrated a common hold and how to break it while injuring the attacker enough for us to get away. They moved so slowly, with exaggerated movements, before we broke into three pairs to practice.
My stomach knotted as Rip worked his way around each of us in turns, practicing the simple escape. Some did it easily, but others needed a second try. Rip remained patient, his instructions clear and concise. He spoke softly as if he were aware that even practicing getting away from an attacker might give us anxiety. Once we’d practiced with each other for the better part of half an hour with Rip or Caleb giving instruction, he called us all together to sit on the mat.
“Now, it’s time for the big test. You’re going to get away from me.”