Total pages in book: 69
Estimated words: 63842 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 319(@200wpm)___ 255(@250wpm)___ 213(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 63842 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 319(@200wpm)___ 255(@250wpm)___ 213(@300wpm)
Caleb raised his hand and Rip raised an eyebrow before nodding. “Anyone who wants to try with me first can. I ain’t as big and intimidating as the big guy here.” He gave us all a friendly smile. “But I’m better looking.” That got laughs from a couple of women. I couldn’t help but smile. Which, I’m sure, was the whole point.
Then Rip stood before me. While I’d practiced with Penny, the difference in size between her and Rip was significant.
“Ready?” he asked quietly.
I nodded, though my throat had gone dry. He hadn’t touched me since that day we’d ridden to the pier, and I found I wanted to be wrapped around him on the back of his bike like I’d been that day.
“I’m going to reach for your right wrist,” he said, narrating each step before making any movement. “You’ll twist toward my thumb and pull away. Nothing fast or hard. I won’t grip you tightly, but I want to get my hand fully around your wrist. Is that OK?”
I nodded again. “Yes.” I raised my hands as he’d shown us. I could do this. It was just practice. Just Rip. He always made me feel safe.
“Here I come,” he warned, reaching out, his scarred fingers encircling my wrist.
The first time we did the move, I was fine. The second, even. Rip went around the group and had us practice getting out several times each with increasing difficulty, wanting us to know it might be difficult but not impossible to break away, and for us to keep trying. Never give up.
The last time he stepped in front of me, I smiled up at him, my shields completely down. Then he grabbed me. The second his hand tightened, my vision tunneled. The community room vanished. The other women disappeared. All I could see was his hand on my skin, large and strong enough to snap bone.
But it wasn’t Rip’s face I saw anymore. It was Eric’s, twisted with rage, eyes bright with sick pleasure.
You’re nothing without me. Nothing!
The memory slammed into me like a physical blow. Eric’s hands pinning my arms above my head. The weight of him crushing my chest. His breath hot and sour on my face as he hissed threats and obscenities while he’d taken what he wanted from me. The sharp crack of my cheek when his fist connected…
I jerked backward violently, a strangled sound tearing from my throat. I stumbled and fell on my ass, crab-walking backward until my back hit the wall. Couldn’t breathe. My lungs seized as if trapped under concrete.
“Jade.”
The voice came from far away, from the other end of a long tunnel. Not Eric’s voice. Deeper. Steadier.
“Jade, look at me.” When I whimpered, the voice repeated, this time with more authority, though still gentle. “Jade. Eyes on me. Now.”
I blinked rapidly, the present and past blurring together. My vision cleared enough to see that Rip had dropped to the floor several feet away from me, crouching low, making himself smaller despite his size.
“Look at the exit sign,” he said, his voice low and even. “Red light. Count the letters.”
My eyes found the glowing sign above the door. “F-four letters,” I managed. The red glow pulsed slightly, or maybe that was just my vision swimming with unshed tears.
“Good girl. That’s it. Tell me where you are.”
I blinked, sucking in a breath as the vision receded even farther. “Haven.”
“That’s good. You’re doing well, honey. Now, tell me what day it is.”
“Tuesday,” I answered mechanically. The adrenaline drop was harder than ever this time. I don’t know if it was because I’d already been active or if the memory had been that visceral, but I felt like every ounce of energy had been leached from my body in a whoosh. I sagged against the wall, tears streaming down my face as I looked up at Rip’s worried face.
The room came back into focus. I saw the other women standing in a loose semicircle, concern etched on their faces. Penny had moved the others back, giving me space. Rip remained on the floor, exactly where he’d been, his eyes steady on mine but not demanding anything.
“You with me, baby?” he asked.
I nodded, then found my voice. “Yes. I’m sorry, I --”
“No apologies, Jade,” he cut me off gently. “Your body remembered something it needed to protect you from.”
I drew my knees to my chest, wrapping my arms around them. Shame burned hot under my skin. “I ruined the class.”
“You didn’t ruin anything,” Rip said. “This happens. More than you’d think.”
I glanced around the room, expecting to see judgment or pity on the other women’s faces. Instead, I saw concern but also a heartbreaking understanding.
“We can stop for today,” Rip offered. “Or you can watch. Or you can try again. Your choice.”
Your choice. Two simple words that meant everything. I’d gone so long without choices that having one now felt overwhelming. I swallowed hard, focusing on the steady rise and fall of my own chest.